Separate Lives
by jalyn712
Summary: With no small thanks to him, she finished what they'd started. -As always, they're not mine; I just like 'em well enough to keep 'em spinning. Rating is for possibilities in future chapters.
1. Chapter 1

He would see her at charity events, and they usually had a nice chat. He would see her at some of the restaurants they both loved, and they would easily say hello and talk about unimportant things for brief moments. He would see her, when they both happened to be at the same events or activities they both loved - and used to do together. And, more often than not these days, it was she who was in the news, and he could never keep himself from watching or reading - just to keep himself in the loop of her life, even if it was in such a removed way. Because that's where they had ended up...removed from one another.

Ass that he was, he never expected to miss her as much as he had...and still did. He had never expected the sheer void he would have to fill with so many other things, when she left for good. And, while it wasn't entirely his fault, the majority of the blame lay with him.

After Elizabeth's departure and several more months down the road, he and CJ had begun their own relationship. One he never should have entered into because he wasn't the man she wanted or needed him to be, and he knew it. He didn't love her the way she loved him. She needed more than he could give, and he hurt her from lack of trying. Though he hadn't cheated on her physically, he was never really with her emotionally. So, it came as no surprise when she ended things with him not a full year later. But, what truly stung was the severing ties with him as completely as she could.

She wanted out, and he let her go. Just like that. And, it wasn't until a few months later, when he began to realize the kind of person he had become that he felt real regret. It wasn't until then that he started to recognize the enormity of what he had given up without a fight. Sure, he'd said the right words at the time, expressed his sorrow and even felt some, but she had seen through all of it. He remembered the emotional wounds he had glimpsed in her eyes, ones that she tried to hide from him, but he didn't feel it until his epiphany - which had come too late. He never acknowledge the pain, until she had already been gone and was taking so well to her new life.

What he wouldn't give, now, to turn back the clock and make it all right.

Impossible dream, and he figured it was his just dessert. His turn to hurt as much as she had for all the reasons he'd ever given her. He never should have engaged in their relationship because he wasn't ready for a love like hers. A heart like hers, given to him on a silver platter. So hopeful, even knowing he wasn't fully vested, but patiently waiting for him to show up.

It shamed him to admit that he'd continued to treat her as the _friend _she'd always been, with the added benefit of having nights together, as well. Rarely, were there declarations of love. He knew, then, that something was wrong with him, but he didn't try very hard to be better for them - for her, for himself.

Matt watched tonight's newscast as he sat nursing a beer. Face unreadable, save for the occasional tick in his jaw, he lost himself in watching her walk up the steps of the LA County Courthouse, as provided by this evening's broadcast. After leaving Houston, Inc., upon leaping at the chance to work with an old friend in his firm, she now represented mostly entertainers and those with societal and financial clout. He admitted to being surprised by her choice, as it seemed less meaningful than what they did at Houston Investigations, but she countered that everyone had problems; just because they were rich and/or famous didn't mean their lives came without their issues. She'd looked him directly in the eye, then, and he had almost replied, "Point taken."

"Besides," she'd added, "it'll be lighter and easier than what we've done here. I could use the break from the crazy ups-and-downs." With that, she'd thrown a pen he'd given her as a gift years before into her briefcase and latched it. Then, she threw her purse over her shoulder, looked at him, and said, "That's it. I'm out of here. Good luck to you, Mattlock."

Something finally began to churn inside of him. The dawning realization that she was walking away for good. When she went to pass him on her way out her old office, he lightly grabbed her elbow. She stopped and looked at him, but her face was unreadable. So unlike the old CJ, who wore her heart on her sleeve, especially where he was concerned. He felt a quick stab in the general area of his heart.

At a sudden loss for words, he'd asked something inane about the rest of her things in the office.

"They're not mine. Houston, Inc. bought them, and the next person who occupies this office is welcome to them if they so choose." Then, she looked down at where he was still holding onto her. He took the hint and let go, and without another word, she walked out the door, through the office, and stepped onto the elevator that led her down to her new life apart from him.

What a cold day it was, despite the sun shining and the 90-degree temperature.

He hadn't been able to do much right for days, thereafter, but he would never blame it on the absence of her. In fact, he rallied the following week and went on for months with a smile on his face and a spring in his step that he didn't really feel. But, he never admitted it to himself or to anyone; he was fine, as far as he was concerned. So, he dated, and he made sure he was photographed with as many beautiful women as possible. Not once recognizing consciously his desire to strike at her for leaving him. Somewhere deep down, he had known it would hurt her, and he ignored it just like everything else.

Just then, the TV flashed to a shot of CJ and her client - a well-known businessman - leaving the courthouse, after finalizing a divorce settlement that seemed to be very pleasing to the businessman in question. While the man was being interviewed, CJ easily stepped out of the frame and no doubt took her leave. Despite her increased comfort levels at being in the public eye, evidently, some things hadn't changed. Rarely, was there an in-depth interview with her; her comments were mostly brief and succinct. The videos and photographs were something she didn't have much control over, however. Ever-present, thanks to the people she now represented, were the cameras. No doubt to her chagrin, _she _was also intriguing to the paparazzi. She had been in the public eye with himself often enough to be considered a celebrity in her own right. Coupled with her physical beauty and own newsworthy history (i.e., Robert Tyler and Costanos, to name but a few), her comings and goings were followed, as well.

Then, there was the company she had begun keeping lately. In all of its documented glory.

Matt's jaw did clench, then. He couldn't help it. You didn't realize how much you truly loved someone, after knowing you'd literally thrown her away, and feel good about seeing her with another man. Right or wrong, it just didn't happen.

She was dating an executive producer who had made a name for himself a few years ago as an up-and-comer to watch. Quickly, he became an icon in the television industry. There was now talk of him transitioning to movies, and that if anyone could make the transition successfully, he was said to be the guy. Personally, Matt wished CJ only happiness, especially after what he'd put her through, but he couldn't help but be irked that she'd chosen someone who seemed to be so far removed from himself as a person.

Her beau was New York City born and bred. He'd most likely never touched a horse, let alone owned one. He was Mr. Entertainment and gave people diversions from their lives, not one who got into the nitty-gritty of them and solved problems on their behalves. Granted, he was tall, rugged-looking, and handsome...Matt's jaw clenched, again...but those were carefully crafted looks that would change with public opinion. Feeling increasingly aggravated, Matt turned off the television and hoisted himself off the couch.

Walking out to his back deck, he looked up at the stars and reflected. If he had been different, he wouldn't be standing here now lamenting the fact that she was with another man, and he no longer had any part in her life. He wouldn't be feeling so God-awful. They could still be together, and he could be standing here, right now, with his arm wrapped around her shoulders; the two of them staring up at the night sky together. Hell, they could even be planning to start their family together. If only...

He threw his beer bottle, then. It soared, cloaked in darkness. Hearing it crash beyond the bounds of sight, he turned and went inside. He'd more than blown it, big-time. There was no denying it.


	2. Chapter 2

_Next chapter!_

CJ kicked off her heels, as soon as she walked in the door. Her house seemed to be the only familiar comfort she kept, these days. Most things were a whirlwind of names, faces,and problems that amounted to much ado about nothing. She felt a lack of fulfillment, really. As if she was more-or-less a professional babysitter. How in the hell did she ever think this area of law would be fun - what she needed?

Sighing, she moved to her bedroom to strip and throw on her robe, before heading to the shower. Allowing the water to heat up sufficiently, she stepped inside for the blissful minutes she would be enclosed and shut off from the rest of her world. With peripheral senses, she heard her cell phone ringing. Refusing to give in to the sigh she felt at the thought of another virtually meaningless phone call, she blocked it out and relished the simplicity of standing in the privacy of her own shower, the soothing spray hitting her skin. Semi-sensory deprivation was heavenly.

She allowed herself to luxuriate awhile, before stepping out and focusing on the rest of what had become her life. Not that it was bad. It just wasn't very meaningful to her. Which, she was discovering she needed very much...

"Damn. Jake," she sighed as she picked up her cell and saw that it was his call that she'd missed, while in the shower. Listening to his voicemail, she nearly cursed a blue streak. The man was going to kill her with these last-minute engagements he consistently wanted her to attend with him. Since when did being a girlfriend equal being a constant arm prop? If the crazy schedule he continued to include her in didn't ease up soon, she was going to ease him right out of her life. God knows she'd had some practice at it.

Immediately regretting her thoughts, she distracted herself by calling him back. She knew full-well it wasn't fair to carry that attitude over to their relationship.

"Hi, sweetheart," he greeted. "I saw you on the news a little while ago. Feel like celebrating?" His deep voice soothed some of her frayed nerves.

"Celebrating? I hardly think that particular case is worth celebrating, _but_ if you're talking about just the two of us having dinner together, I'm in. It will be just the two of us, right? No shindig, no out-of-office schmooze-session, no Premiere...hint-hint..." She ended her diatribe, before she really got going and truly insulted him.

To her relief, he only chuckled. "I know you hate those things, but I appreciate you going and tolerating. It's just that I'm crazy about you and want you with me as much as possible. I'm sorry if I mix business and pleasure a lot, but in this industry, I've got to keep up or I'm out. Still, I'd hate to lose you in the process," he said sincerely.

At that, most of her tension eased away. "I like being with you, too. I don't mind going. It's just that it's so often, Jake. I look forward to spending time with you, alone. And, to be honest, if this is how it is for anyone with a name in the entertainment industry, I can understand how relationships and marriages don't last. I'm sorry if I'm being too blunt, but I've no intention of being in a relationship that isn't really a relationship but more of a photo-op. Been there, done that," she added under her breath and immediately regretted her thoughts, again.

"You're not being too blunt. I appreciate the candor. Honestly, I dislike most of it, myself. But I love what I do too much to give it up for its downsides. But, whenever you would like to decline an invitation to a social occasion, I will understand. I would rather miss you not being by my side than I would you not being in my life."

Damn, he was good. He melted her heart.

"Besides," he added "I'm the one who signed up for it, when I chose this career path. Not you...even if you do represent half of the entertainment industry," he kidded gently.

"I know, I know. I chose this current path, too. I just never thought it would be so demanding and personally invasive. I'm only legal counsel, but I've wound up in the papers as much as my clients. It's crazy," she trailed off, knowing that it wasn't totally crazy considering where she'd come from - and with whom.

"You know it's not so crazy," he confirmed. "You were already a person of interest before you left Houston," he caught her sigh at the reminder but continued, "and with the nature of your previous work and the press those cases regularly received, you weren't an unknown figure even before the affair."

She was glad he couldn't see her physically blanch at his phrasing. She'd loved Houston deeply, but theirs really had amounted to only a short affair. The good part is that, though she had given it her all and hoped for the best, she had known when to get out.

For a lighter effect, Jake added, "And, with your beauty..."

She did laugh, then. He teased her regularly about being beautiful enough to be in pictures - his kind of pictures - because he knew that she thought the notion was preposterous.

"Okay, okay. Let's drop this discussion. You come pick me up in that nice little sports car of yours that I do so adore. Then, you can take me somewhere off the beaten path, alright? I want as much anonymity as we can get, this evening. Just you, me, and an environment where we're less likely to be hounded. Those are my terms. Take 'em or leave 'em," she said, tongue-in-cheek.

"Lady, you've got it. One ultra-fast car, you, me, and dinner in a dive. Check, check, check, and check."

"Good. See you in an hour?" she confirmed.

"Less, if traffic is halfway decent. I'm on my way, now."

"Excellent. I'll be waiting with bells on," she teased.

"Ooo, now that, I'd like to see." His voice turned gruff.

"Now, now. Dinner, first. If you behave like a gentleman and are very lucky, I'll let you get to second base at the end of our date," she rebuffed.

He laughed heartily, then. "I'm glad I found you. I'll see you soon."

With that, he clicked off the line, but his words stayed with her well after he showed up, and they had their evening - just the two of them. As promised.


	3. Chapter 3

Roy noticed Mattlock's increasing discontent. It was hard not to.

"So, are you going to tell me what's got you so stirred up?" He could guess, but he thought it best for his nephew to voice it aloud. Starting the healing process late was better than never starting it, at all.

"I'm fine." Matt had no intention of discussing the subject in the forefront of his mind with his uncle.

"Hardly. If you don't want to talk with me, you should find someone you don't mind talking to." Roy leveled him a knowing gaze.

"I don't need a shrink, Uncle Roy," he intoned angrily. Then, he walked to the bar and poured his second scotch before noon. It wasn't his habit, but he'd spent the week brooding over his reflections from the weekend.

"I didn't say you needed a therapist. I believe I said that you need someone to talk to. Or, a healthy outlet for what's clearly bothering you so much." His tone wasn't forgiving, as he watched his nephew sip at his drink.

Sighing, Matt sat his glass on the bar. "Yes, you're right. I need to figure some things out. I'm just not sure how to go about it."

Roy decided to push a little. "Anyone can see that you're in pain. Any chance this is your way of finally grieving over CJ?" It was mostly a statement, and he received the desired reaction - eye contact. He felt for his nephew, but it was time for him to come to grips with what had transpired.

"How do you do that?" Without waiting for an answer, Matt ran a hand through is hair and continued, "Yes, it has to do with her. Mostly, it's about me - and what I didn't do. I blew it." He huffed an uneasy breath, then.

Roy couldn't disagree, so he offered no platitudes. "Then, you're going to have to make peace with it. You made mistakes that had serious consequences. So, you learn from them and move forward. Perhaps, CJ has given you a great gift - understanding how to love someone, even if she won't be The One."

Matt hung his head, then. "I know, Uncle Roy. But, I've been struggling to move past wanting another chance with her. To love her, again, and do it right." He looked back to his uncle but saw only confirmation that it most likely wouldn't be happening.

"My boy, when dreams become fantastical, they become dangerous. I'm not saying that what you want is wrong, but remember to throw in a healthy dose of reality. It'll keep you grounded."

Roy hated bursting his nephew's bubble, but he'd been around and witnessed the relationship between Mattlock and CJ. If they ever came together, again, their relationship would be wholly different. He knew it as surely as he knew there were white fluffy clouds in a bright blue sky, today. But, he would never begrudge CJ - whom he loved as much as his own flesh and blood - for leaving. He also hoped that she find every last morsel of happiness destined to belong to her, regardless of where it came from - or with whom.

"I looked the gift horse in the mouth," Matt responded sullenly.

"Son, you didn't even know there was a gift horse around."


	4. Chapter 4

CJ hummed one of her favorite tunes, as she worked in her flower garden. This weekend was hers, and she felt blissful in the knowledge. She planned to work in her yard, until her muscles ached. Then, she was going to take a soothing shower and end the day by reading a book, accompanied with a tasty glass of Moscato, on her back patio. Pure bliss.

She was so enthralled with her current pursuit that everything else faded away. The usually-constant thoughts of work, of her relationship with Jake, of how...and why...they eventually met never entered her mind. She was on a brief sabbatical from being herself - the one the rest of her world wanted on-call and would turn inside-out without batting an eye, at times.

Only if the thoughts were pleasant and brought smiles to her face, did she allow them to stay.

One, in particular, was of a rock musician she had briefly dated a little over a year ago. She had been stunned that he had wanted anything to do with her, considering how _not _wild she was; then, when she'd finally said yes, it was her turn to be happily surprised to find he also had a deep love of classical music - with his own degree from Juilliard - and was something of a homebody, who preferred staying in to going out and partying with the rest of the band and its groupies. Though they hadn't dated very long, they still remained friends and kept in contact. He was good man, and she was glad that she'd met him.

Her thoughts easily drifted from there. Thanks to that association, it brought with it an informal initiation into the music world, and she'd soon thereafter discovered the pleasurable company of another musician who was hot in the indie scene. She'd enjoyed his company just as much, and they also remained friends and kept in touch.

In fact, when she really thought about it, she'd kept in contact with all of her exes. Except one. She frowned, then, and reminded herself that _that _was a completely different scenario and got back to the business of thinking pleasurable things that matched her mood and goals for this weekend.

She'd even become close with Dicky Bevac. Completely unrelated from the musicians, Dicky had been wanting representation by her firm. Once he'd learned that she was an associate attorney, he specifically requested her to represent him. Though it was several months into the new job, and she'd gained enough experience in this different area of law, she hadn't been quite separated enough from her old life - and wasn't necessarily prepared for her meeting with him and what she thought she would have to endure.

At one point, after she believed he had made a pass at her, she let him know that her interest in him was purely that of attorney-client. She stayed respectful and apologized if he took offense, but she let him know that she found his choice of phrasing questionable. Then, she turned and crossed to the windows to look at the LA skyline for few brief moments of respite.

A very different perspective than that atop the Houston, Inc. building greeted her in significant ways. And, God help her, she still missed that view...that place in time which still had her heart in its grasp.

She heard Dicky's armchair creak subtly and figured that he was leaving, after her comments. In a moment, she would gather her wits and decide what to say to the partners about the potential loss of this important client.

Till then, she crossed her arms and spoke to herself quietly, "What I'd give for room to breathe..."

She was tired of feeling like she was a hot commodity because of her relationship with Houston. Tired of feeling like the firm was using it to their advantage. Tired of people wanting to be seen with her due to the notoriety it might bring them. Though she took it all with as much grace as she could muster, she still felt bruised and like she was being dragged behind her favorite horse, instead of guiding it from the saddle. Some days, like today, she felt more kinship with a gutter rat than the portrayed picture of happiness in the society and entertainment sections.

She jumped at the touch of a hand on her shoulder. Dropping her arms to her sides, she turned and saw that Mr. Bevac was still with her. Before she could speak, he wisely and intuitively stated, "It was never for show. You truly loved him." And, though she didn't break down, she fought back the tears that threatened to spill.

"Yes," was all she had said.

That's when she met a Dicky Bevac she would never have dreamed existed. He became a normal human being – even his facial features seemed to change before her eyes - and she discovered the man he truly was, behind the public facade. Quickly, she would discover that only those at the core of his inner circle truly knew the man, so she was given the most fortunate of gifts that day.

"Let's sit, shall we?" And, just like that, _he_ became _her_ counsel.

He took her hand and led her to the two armchairs sitting before her desk. Nearly knee-to-knee, thanks to their arrangement, he looked her in the eye and said, "I'm going to share something with you that very few people know – or may ever know."

Enraptured, she waited. This wasn't the Dicky Bevac she was accustomed to, and she knew that he was about to tell her something important.

"Many years ago, I had a great love of my own, and it shattered my heart when it failed; I was miserable and barely functioned for months. Even so, life got easier - and there _will_ be more to come and more people to love in your future, CJ. Your relationship and subsequent breakup with Mattlock Houston wasn't the end for you. Far from it. In fact, you have literally been given the gift of a new beginning, so don't waste this opportunity. Seize it. While I used my grief to create the character of Dicky - my happier alter-ego...and, yes, it worked out very well for me, professionally...you will find your own niche, your own way of being that will feel good to you, too. And, you will do it with style. Of that, I have no doubt because you're an incredible, talented, beautiful young woman. CJ, the world will be your oyster, if you will but allow it."

CJ's eyes threatened to spill over at his sincerity. Impulsively, she asked, "May I call you Richard? In private, of course." She realized that she wanted this man's friendship very much. A far cry from wanting him to leave her office mere minutes ago.

"Absolutely. Close friends and family frequently do so in private." He smiled, which let her know that he felt the same about their budding friendship.

"Thank you," she said, heartfelt.

He reached to pat her hand, and she squeezed his in response. "May I take you to lunch, Richard? I feel my appetite returning." She gave him a brilliant smile, then. The first genuine smile, not merely for show, that she'd felt in months.

"My dear, I accept." He added, "As long as you're agreeable that Dicky will be with us?" His way of reminding her that, once they walked out of her office, his public persona would be back in place.

"Not at all. It will be fun to watch him play. In fact, I do believe I'll be looking for pointers on how to have fun in the public eye," she winked.

"Wonderful! Shall we?" he asked as he stood and extended his elbow.

"Absolutely," and she accepted his escort.

With that, a wonderful friendship blossomed and grew to its current status: one more akin to a father-daughter relationship, as they'd come to adopt each other in such a fashion. Unlikely as it may seem - and despite the facts that Dicky had never had children, CJ had never really had a father, and they were getting a very late start at this - their bond had grown strong quickly. Even the press had picked up on it, and though their special relationship was never expressly declared, it was respected as such. Rare, for this town.

And, one thing was certain: CJ knew a gift horse when she saw one.


	5. Chapter 5

_Next chapter! Hope you're at least being entertained... _:)

They were at a premier for one of Jake's friends, another talented director-producer in today's limelight. CJ assumed the two men were close friends, even though Jake had never referred to Alan as such. Most of the time, she found this business to be so strange...there were all kinds of public declarations, but in private, it was rare to hear of genuine closeness between people.

It was a far cry from what she'd been taught growing up – ironically, mostly outside of her own family - but she had promised herself to stop comparing the different worlds; it was like comparing apples and elephants. Though, the longer she experienced it, the more she believed that she didn't belong in it.

Looking around this evening's soiree, she sighed. She loved Jake – she truly did – but this wasn't the life for her. Neither this relationship nor her current profession were fulfilling her. In fact, it had been a long time since she'd felt fulfilled, period.

Most of her life had been about other people – wanting to help them, to love them...and wanting them to love her in return. She so wanted to feel like she truly belonged...somewhere. Ultimately, she knew the issues lay with her, but it didn't change the fact that she wasn't as happy as she wanted to be.

For a long time, she'd thought that she belonged in Houston's world, in his life. But, in the midst of their relationship, she realized it had been a pipe dream all along. There was no - and would be no - fulfillment in being with him as she'd always dreamed. In hindsight, she could admit that they were simply having sex, and instead of bringing them closer, it created a crevasse. Her longest-held dream had cost her her heart because of her inability to let it go of it and move on. Perhaps, if she had been able to see things for what they really were, she would still have a best friend. And, perhaps, life would have been more fulfilling and easier to live.

She sighed, again. This thinking was getting her nowhere. Rummaging around in the past would only leave her feeling empty. Like now, like always.

Just then, a deep voice rumbled for her ears only, "Would you like to go, now?"

She barely refrained from blurting out, "Oh, thank God." Instead, she turned and smiled up at Jake, "Yes. I'm tired of standing in these heels."

He glanced down and murmured suggestively, "Well, we can remedy that fairly quickly, once we're home."

Immediately, she got goose bumps, her body responding to his seductive tone. She had to fight it and remind him that she needed to be up early for a deposition. As it was, it was already late, and she needed her beauty sleep.

"If you get anymore beautiful, I'm going to have to chain you to the bed - and then never leave it, myself," he half-joked.

She touched his cheek. "You have such a way with words." She winked. "But, I need to go to my house, tonight. You're welcome to stay, but you have to behave. I really do need to be on top of my game, tomorrow."

"I know, and I promise to behave," he smiled. He was so considerate of her, and he was such a congenial man...she couldn't believe that she would have thoughts of calling it quits over a world that existed outside of them, outside of what they had together. It didn't seem fair, and she wound up feeling like a heel. Still, she didn't know how she'd deal with all of the notoriety in the long-term – _if_ a long-term was proposed, at some point.

They said their requisite goodbyes and were waiting for the valet to bring Jake's car around, when he asked, "A penny for them?"

Snapped out of her reverie, she looked up at him and smiled, again. He really was a handsome man, and he hadn't disappointed her once in the months they'd been seeing each other. He was dependable, honest, kind, caring, attentive, and respectful. So, why was she bouncing between wanting to stay with him and wanting to end their relationship, altogether? It didn't make any sense. He was damn-near perfect. And, the fact that he was damn-near perfect, while working in this industry and in this town, made him a one-in-a-million catch.

Knowing so made her feel defective in a fundamental way, and it hurt. Why wasn't she head-over heels in love with this guy? Why wasn't she so giddy that she was blinded to the rest of the fodder? He was everything she had ever wanted in a partner, but she didn't feel the way she thought she'd feel, when she had him in-the-flesh.

Again, it made her feel defective. So, in reply, she stated a truth they both could be pleased with, "I was thinking about how wonderful you are."

This did the trick of making him smile wider and squeeze her hand. It also squeezed her heart - but not in a good way. This is how she knew she was about to have her heart broken, again. She would be doing it to herself one more time...but, instead of not being loved by the one she adored, she wasn't adoring the one who loved her. The irony wasn't lost on her.

In the end, Jake took their breakup as well as he could. He respected her decision because, as he stated, he knew all along that the publicity of their relationship regularly chipped away at her comfort level. If anything made her feel worse, it was his assurance that he understood as best he could and wished her nothing but happiness. She believed every word he said; he was good to the core – and, once again, it hurt her that she didn't feel for him what he felt for her.

That she couldn't love him enough to not notice the rest pissed her off and left her in tears more than once. What was wrong with her?

It seemed that her heart had other ideas about what would be best for her. IF there was a best for her. Maybe, she was destined to roam, not really settling down in one place with one person forever. Maybe, her destiny was the exact opposite of what she had always wanted, dreamed of, prayed for...

Which was probably the case, considering her lack of roots – save for the Houston family – and her genetic makeup, which amounted to a bunch of gypsies on her mother's side. As for her father's side, she was never privy to them once the man himself had died. And, she had never summoned the desire to contact people who weren't interested in her, in the first place.

The question, now, was what she was going to do with herself? She didn't want the limelight, and that included the one that came with her current profession.

What to do? Perhaps, she'd take a sabbatical from what had been her life, thus far. She'd do something different – even vastly different from the paths and detours she'd taken up to this point. She knew just the person to talk to about it. He always helped her to discover clarity. Dicky. That's who she needed. So, that's who she called.

"How are you, love? I haven't heard from you in a few days and was wondering if I needed to drop by and check in on you," he said, as soon as she rang.

"No, no. I'm doing well. I actually wanted to see if we could meet for lunch sometime soon. I'm in need of a good pow-wow. Life is changing, again, and I value your input," she said with sincerity.

"I am here for you, whenever you need me. I'm free today. You decide when and where, and I'll be by to pick you up."

"How about I come to you, and we plant ourselves in that wonderfully overstuffed leather couch of yours? We can eat, drink, and be merry in private. I want downtime and privacy – and to be myself with someone I trust."

"You've got it, kid. I'm not going anywhere, so come at your leisure. I'll be here."

And, he would be there for her in every way that counted.


	6. Chapter 6

_One more up! Thanks for reading and reviewing. _ :)

A small part of Matt tap-danced at the news that CJ and Jake Herrington were no longer an item. It had surprised everyone, including himself, but it was now official; according to Jake's publicist, they were no longer together. Though it was irrational for him to feel lighter with the knowledge, he couldn't help it.

Even so, it niggled at him that neither Jake nor CJ had been seen with anyone else in recent weeks. It spoke to the seriousness of their feelings for one another that neither seemed to be rebounding easily. If theirs had only been a casual thing, Jake would have been seen with another woman fairly quickly; it's how this town worked...Matt would know.

So, it didn't escape him that Jake was showing CJ more respect than he himself had, upon their own breakup. When a man loved a woman – could admit it and live it – he didn't disrespect her by hopping out on the town with every other beautiful woman he could get his hands on as soon as they were over. And, Jake was proving it; he was a good-looking, successful, highly-sought-after man and could pick any woman to have on his arm, but he was spotted alone – save for his security detail – everywhere he went. It spoke volumes.

As for CJ, she was also solo and staying out of the press as much as she could. In fact, other than when she was seen with clients, she was virtually off the grid. Though, there had been one or two sightings of her with Dicky Bevac. Speaking of which, Matt was perplexed at how that relationship had come into being; he had the memory of their initial meeting, after all, and Dicky hadn't been pleased with CJ nor himself by the time they had left. Of course, CJ had been a fan of the man's movies and neither had she been the one verbally pressing his buttons that day.

But, their relationship was beside the point. Dicky wasn't a threat to his next chance with CJ. In that regard, it was time for him to do some investigative work. He was going to finagle his way into being at the next few events she would be attending. Even though she was playing it low-key, surely her presence would be required at occasional functions on behalf of the law firm, at the very least. He'd start there. Fire Baby up and see what he could garner for his own benefit.

Roy walked in and asked, "What are you up to, son?" He was looking at two very large side-by-side photos of CJ and Jake Herrington, as seen on Baby. On the couch, his nephew sat with is head down. Roy was afraid that Mattlock's depression had taken a deeper turn, but was relieved upon closer inspection – his nephew's head was bent because he was making notes in a spiral-bound notebook.

Though, this gave Roy concern for a very different reason; he didn't think any good could come from Mattlock doing an in-depth study of CJ and her recent love.

Looking up, Houston said, "Uncle Roy. I didn't hear you come in."

"I'm aware of that," Roy said, glancing back to Baby's screen.

"Oh, that. I was just doing some research..." Matt didn't feel like getting into it with his uncle, but he knew he was in a pickle thanks to the images smiling back at them from Baby's screen.

"Do we need to talk, son?"

Matt sighed. "No, Uncle Roy. We do not need to talk. I've not gone off the deep end. To be honest, I feel better than I have in a long time," he stated.

Roy just looked at him, at a loss for words.

Matt stood up. "Care for a drink," he asked as he headed towards the bar.

"Juice would be nice," Roy said and followed him. He sat on a bar stool while Matt served up their drinks from the other side.

"What's going on, boy?" Like usual, Roy was straight-to-the-punch.

"What's going on, Uncle Roy," Matt smirked, "is the fact that I have been given another chance." He looked at CJ's visage, still smiling on the big screen.

"How do you figure that?" Roy asked, incredulous.

For the first time in years, he felt like throttling his nephew. Which really took some doing because he'd made it through watching Mattlock with CJ, during their relationship, and he had only felt sorry for the younger man – knowing she wasn't the kind of woman to take it for very long. And, he'd been right.

So, this second chance Mattlock was speaking of? Roy couldn't fathom what had entered his nephew's noggin to make him think she'd ever give him one. After all, she'd spent most of her life in his world, and _she'd left_. Not that it was a bad world, and they had always loved one another. Even today, Roy would not be convinced that CJ's love for Mattlock had died...but, she'd purposely flipped the switch off, and once a person did that, she would be hard-pressed to willingly turn it back on. It was too painful to do once, let alone multiple times.

Matt said, "I've been hoping for something, anything, to help me reach her, Uncle Roy. With the recent break-up, I have a chance to approach her, again."

"What makes you think that?" Roy was playing hardball. "She left you, Mattlock, because you acted like you didn't want much to do with her. Right now, she's going through yet another heartbreak. You showing up now would be tantamount to rubbing salt in a wound. Why can't you let the woman breathe and move on with her life?"

Stunned speechless, Matt could do little more than look at his uncle. He could think of nothing to say. He certainly hadn't expected this unrelenting censure from his close family member.

"I mean it, Mattlock. I watched you with her. I watched _her_ with you. All of your lives. But, entering a full-fledged relationship with her - and never putting a drop of yourself into it - was plain wrong. So, let me be brutally honest with you, boy. If you go after her and hurt her, again, I will personally kick your butt back to Texas and not let up until all of my frustrations with you are well spent!" With that, Roy sat his glass on the bar – hard, which sloshed some of its contents onto the surface – and strode to the elevator, successfully removing himself from the suite altogether.

It had more than the desired effect: Matt thought long and hard about what he was going to do. He wouldn't be acting until he gave serious contemplation to all that had come before, in order to set a better tone for the future.


	7. Chapter 7

It certainly wasn't what CJ had had in mind, when she'd acted on impulse. In fact, doing so had pretty much been counterproductive to her new goals, and she was going to wind up in the public eye. Again.

She could imagine how hypocritical she would come off to Jake. Though their relationship had ended months ago, she thought of him regularly and missed him. Still, it wasn't enough to start over with him. Hers was mostly a fondness for an experience she would hold near and dear to her heart for as long as she lived. He had given her the one good relationship that hadn't ended in tragedy or devastation. Though it hadn't worked out, it would always feel like the blessing it was – and she would keep a special place in her heart reserved for him.

Which is why she didn't want him thinking ill of her, now.

She looked at the proof of the photograph that would be gracing the album cover for another of her exes - the indie musician who was finally catching on like wildfire with the public. When she'd agreed to 'help him out,' she hadn't known what she'd be getting herself into. Ignorantly, she'd thought he'd needed her legal advice. But, no. Once she'd shown up to their arranged meeting, she'd wanted to throttle him. Yet, he'd soothingly talked her into modeling and enjoying the experience with the renowned photographer who'd been hired to do his latest album cover. Amazingly, she had acquiesced _and_ had enjoyed herself.

Only, now, those few hours were going to cost her the hard-won privacy she was finally beginning to achieve.

One afternoon...and poof. Up in smoke.

The executives were talking excitedly of billboards, even snatching two of the most notables – one in Hollywood and one in Times Square.

She couldn't deny the picture and artwork had turned out extraordinary, and it physically captured and represented the theme of the album, but she wanted to hang her head in personal dismay.

'_What you resist persists..._'

Indeed.

"What's wrong, love?" Dicky asked her the following afternoon at lunch.

She had been picking at a salad – something she rarely ordered, when dining out (what was the point in going out to eat, if you were just going to order a salad?) - but looked up at him, a little forlorn. She sighed and set her fork down. Then, she reached into the attache she'd brought along and grabbed her copy of the proof for the album cover.

She handed it to Dicky, saying, "From the meeting, yesterday."

He raised an eyebrow at her. "You're stunning, as usual, but if my gut is telling me right...and I'm sure it is...you're on the cover of one of this year's most-talked-about albums?..." He adequately summed it up.

"Yes. I acted on a whim, and it carried me away to yet another place I don't wish to be. Steve asked me to help him out, only I got roped into something other than legal advice..." There was no point in going over the details. The picture told the tale.

"Ah. And, now, you're mad-sad-forlorn because you're going to be out there for the world to see, again." He knew her so well, she didn't need to answer.

He surprised her, when instead of telling her it would die down in its own time – and she'd get her earned privacy back in no time – he said, "CJ, why don't you embrace it? Maybe, The Big Guy, " and he pointed Heavenward, "is trying to tell you something."

She nearly choked on her sip of iced tea.

"How can you say that?" she asked, astounded. "I'm not a public figure. I'm just a country girl who followed the wrong guy to La-La Land and wound up in shoes that are too big."

Dicky laughed outright, then. A deep belly-laugh that made her see red.

"I hardly think this is funny." Tears stung the back of her eyes. She'd wanted to have a successful career, be a lawyer at the top of her game and help people, but mostly, she wanted to be a wife and a mother. Those was her highest ideals.

Dating famous people, appearing as fodder in tabloids and entertainment news, being followed by photographers because of who she knew and/or dated, appearing on covers of business journals, being on the 6 o'clock news...those were things that should never have been a part of her life. As far as she was concerned, they were counterproductive to her goals, and she'd never reach them as long as these kinds of things kept happening to her. As long as she kept _allowing_ them to happen to her.

"I'm not laughing at you, CJ," Dicky reached for her hand and gave a gentle squeeze. "I simply think you're mistaken about your life. You can still have what you want. But, you should be embracing the paths you've taken, not lamenting them. There's nothing wrong with being thought so much of, photographed so beautifully, and shown off to the world. Do you have any idea how many young women dream of being in your shoes? I know you'd like to switch places with some of them, but _this_ is your life. Embrace it. Hold your head high – and one day, you'll have some incredible stories to tell to your grandchildren."

That got through to her. She perked up at the thought of having grandchildren, one day. It made her sniffle with longing but also hope. She wanted that more than anything, and finally – finally! - she could imagine regaling little ones with tales of her younger life. It was a perspective she'd never thought of, before.

"I knew I kept you around for a reason," she smiled with watery eyes at Dicky.

"I love you, too," he said with deep affection.

They finished their lunch and talked of lighter things – such as earlier life experiences – and CJ felt much better about where she'd been, and what she'd done, than she had in a long long time.


	8. Chapter 8

_Next chapter. Enjoy!_

There was an album-launch party at Universal Studios, and 'anyone who was anyone' was attending.

CJ had no doubt that Jake would be there, and she hoped to be able to speak with him privately for a few minutes. She'd called him before the billboard was unveiled, and he'd let her know that he had heard through the grapevine what had transpired. He assured her that he had no ill thoughts of her – actually, he was more concerned for her than anything because he knew her reticence to being in the public eye was genuine. When she had given him the abbreviated version of how things had transpired, he'd only inquired if she was alright. Through a pang that had gentled over time, she admitted that, yes, she was fine with what was happening. This time, she was going to go with it; let the chips fall where they may. After all, Steve and his music were the bigger picture, here – pun intended. They'd both gotten a chuckle out of that and rang off soon thereafter.

She was glad that she had taken the time to call Jake. Though she didn't plan to spend much time with him, tonight, she did want to say hello and wish him well on his newest film - also due to premiere soon.

Dicky was her escort to this party, and she mandated that he not leave her side. He'd good-naturedly agreed and was making good on his promise. As he was speaking with some of his own associates in the film industry, she was happily ruminating on her shift in attitude. He had helped her to see how nothing was amiss. Everything was flowing fine.

She looked around and smiled at the crowd milling about, the music playing – essentially, Steve's music, along with other artists on this particular label – and even the giant replica of the album cover situated behind the stage that Steve would be performing on later in the evening.

She thanked passers-by who told her how lovely she looked. And, she did feel attractive in this silk sheath dress; the beach blue color flattered her tan, the ultra-thin spaghetti straps subtly highlighted her collarbones, and the calf-length hem was angled to show off more of her left leg than the right. In all, the dress felt as if it had been made for her, and she smiled at the thought it might be her own kind of show-stopper.

The well-wishers also commented how much they liked the album cover and how they were enjoying the preview of Steve's new album...all as Dicky was deep in conversation with his cohorts. She thanked her lucky stars that she was calm and mostly detached from her part in it. Hers was an idle role, and she would enjoy the attention for awhile. Dicky's words had hit their mark, and she was going to remember this evening – and have tales to tell to her children and grandchildren.

In the midst of smiling at her own thoughts, something caught her attention. At first, she had a sense of unease. Was someone watching her? But, as quickly as it came, the thought vanished; her attention was drawn to movement in the crowd, and it seemed familiar. Then, realization hit. It was someone she hadn't seen, personally, in ages. Months...a year? Their paths simply hadn't crossed, and she'd been okay with it. She felt no ill will towards him – she wasn't sure she ever could – but her heartbeat quickened at the sight of him, and she had to fight the instinct to turn and flee in the opposite direction.

She wasn't a coward. She was strong, and she was hardly the devastated woman she'd been when she'd left him. That was years ago, now, and she had moved on. Tonight was a shining example of that, and suddenly, she was even happier that she had this album cover to show for her time. It made her want to kiss Steve, instead of wanting to kick him in the butt for what he'd wrangled her into many weeks ago. That brought another smile to her face.

Which caught _his_ eye, as he walked in her direction. Whether he was walking towards her on purpose or it was coincidental, she couldn't say, but he did catch her smile at the time it appeared and thought it was for his benefit. Then, something happened that momentarily took her breath away. Matt Houston smiled back at her in a way that he hadn't in a very very long time. Her smile hadn't been meant for him, but it had gifted her with one that was genuine, pleased to see her, and snapped her back to a time and place before all of this had taken place. Back to a ranch in Texas where they rode horses, herded cattle, cleaned stables – and knew how to let their hair down, let go, and have a good time. Back when they loved each other's company...and each other...

Matt finished making his way to her, and she tensed slightly. Dicky sensed this and looked her way, then at the approaching figure. His face didn't betray his displeasure; he was too mannerly to give it away publicly, but she could feel it. Even so, he really did keep to his policy of only offering his opinions and advice, when she asked for it.

"CJ," Matt said, and reached for her elbow, as he bent to greet her with a kiss on the cheek. So like other greetings in the past.

He stood upright and looked past her. "Mr. Bevac," he said and shook Dicky's hand briefly.

The rest of the group became quiet as they watched what was transpiring. For, CJ and Matt had rarely been seen together since their affair had ended nearly three years ago. This seemed big, and to prove it, a couple of flashes erupted not too far away. Photographers at the event had certainly not wasted any time in capturing this moment.

CJ widened her smile and said, "It's good to see you, Houston." That's when she saw Uncle Roy standing behind him, to his right. Immediately, tears came to her eyes, and she stepped past Matt to hug the older man tightly.

"Roy," she said for his ears only, "I've missed you so..."

He pulled back to kiss her cheek and said, "That goes double for me, child." Then, he looked at the album cover behind the stage and said, "But, I can see that you're doing well for yourself. And, you look as beautiful as ever. I'm happy for you." His eyes never left hers, and she felt instant relief. She realized, in that moment, that she had been wanting some kind of acknowledgment that she had done what was right, when she left Matt. He was giving it to her, and so, she hugged him tightly once more.

She sniffled, and he said for her ears only, "Hey, now. None of that." Then, louder for the others to hear, "This is a party. We're here to celebrate!"

She stood back and said, "Yes. Yes, we are! Roy, I don't believe you ever had the pleasure, but I'd like to introduce to you Richard 'Dicky' Bevac."

With that, having watched what had transpired between the two, Dicky easily extended his hand and shook Roy's. "It's a pleasure, Mr. Houston."

"Likewise. And, it's Roy."

"Dicky, then."

Both men nodded at one another, speaking volumes – amounts of respect exchanging.

Matt spoke then, "I agree with Uncle Roy, CJ. You look beautiful. In person and on the album cover. Congratulations."

"Thank you, Houston. But, really, tonight is about Steve and his new album. Thankfully. The press is mostly focused where it belongs. His album is exceptional..." She trailed off, not knowing exactly what to say from here.

Matt was content to let this first opportunity end here. There would be others to speak with her during the evening. This was a start, after all. The slowest of ease...

"Well, we should let you get back to your conversation. Ladies, gentlemen...Mr. Bevac." He nodded his head to the rest of people in the group and made to move.

Uncle Roy kissed CJ on the cheek once more and told her, "If there's dancing, later, I will be seeking you out." He winked at her, and she beamed at him. Just like old times, and she felt happy even through the tightening in her chest.

She watched them walk away, but she knew this wasn't another end. Somehow, she felt certain there was a beginning on the horizon, and she welcomed it – whatever it may be.


	9. Chapter 9

_This is a much longer chapter than the others. Hope you like it. As always, I appreciate your reviews! _

Happily, the album party was a big success.

CJ had more photographs taken – some with Steve, some with the original photographer, album executives...she lost count of the number of people she posed with out of 'necessity.' But, if she thought she'd been busy, she knew Steve had to be overwhelmed. Yet, seeing the smile remained on his face, she knew he was on Cloud 9. He was finally getting the recognition he deserved.

Over the course of the evening, she had been separated from Dicky. While she had thought it would bother her, she found that wasn't the case.

In fact, she had been able to spend time with Jake and was glad for it. They'd had a good conversation, and he had congenially let her know that he had met someone and was quietly dating her; soon, though, they would begin making their rounds publicly. CJ wasn't shocked, and she congratulated him. Even nicer was the fact that she meant it and could say so without remorse, envy, or any of the usual emotions that could crop up, when hearing an ex was moving on.

Roy had sought her out, once, to dance to a remake of an "oldie but goodie," and she'd been more than happy to oblige. In fact, she'd been sorry that the song had ended because she hadn't seen him since. Come to think of it, she hadn't seen Houston once he'd left their group at the start of the evening. No matter...

Steve was currently making his way onstage, and her body buzzed in time with the welcoming applause. She smiled and even whistled shrilly in her support. It was dark, now, and while the park was lit by the surrounding lamps and artfully-placed twinkling lights, she still felt a sense of anonymity in the crowd; it enhanced her comfort level all the more.

Though, twenty minutes into Steve's set, CJ felt the hairs on the back of her neck begin to stand on end. It was the sense of unease she'd experienced, earlier - before she'd spotted Houston walking her way.

Surreptitiously, she glanced around but couldn't spot anything out of the ordinary. Of course, it wouldn't be easy to do in this crowd and with the lack of proper lighting, but she couldn't shake the feeling that she was being watched. She also thought she'd heard something. Like the whisper of her name on a breeze, but that was crazy considering the ongoing concert.

Idly, she wondered if she'd heard Dicky, Roy, Jake, or even Houston searching for her in this crowd. The thought made her turn her head around in an obvious manner because, if that was the case, she wanted the person to know she was acknowledging them. But, it proved folly. Telling herself that she had been mistaken, she tried focusing on the concert again but to no avail. The thought that something was amiss pervaded, and her discomfort increased.

'It's silly,' she tried telling herself and slipped out of the throng of people. Once she was in open air, she felt a little better. Walking to one of the mini-bars that had been set up for this event, she ordered a glass of shiraz. Gratefully, she sipped the slightly sweet liquid and allowed it to seep warmth into her suddenly chilled bones.

She stayed near the mini-bar and made idle chitchat with the employees. They didn't seem to mind talking with the woman who'd posed for the album cover, and she was happy to distract herself into thinking everything was okay.

"Miss?" One of the young men behind the bar caught CJ's attention.

"Yes?" she smiled at him.

"I don't mean to be nosy, but...do you know that man?" He used his eyes and a slight tilt of his head to give her the general direction for a casual inspection.

She waited several seconds before she sipped her wine and halfway turned, still engaging in idle chat with the young man. Both were in tune with this drill, and considering how she'd been feeling uneasy for the last while, she was grateful for his assistance – whether she turned out to need it or not. Of course, she turned and realized why the hair stood on the back of her neck. She couldn't remember specifics, but the man leaning against one of the outbuildings across the way did seem familiar to her. Unfortunately, he was _eerily_ familiar, and it disturbed her that she couldn't specifically place him.

She cleared her throat and spoke to the young barkeep, never taking her eyes off of the man. "I don't know him, but there's something about him..." she added with inflection to acknowledge her discomfort.

"One of my buddies is working Security, tonight. You shouldn't be walking around here unescorted. You never know who might show up to one of these things. I'm going to get him over here. See what he can find out. No harm, no foul. Okay?" He wanted her permission before taking action.

"That's fine," she said. It disturbed her to no end that the man in question had no compunction about staring. Not once did he look embarrassed nor try to glance away. He was intent – and intense. Even from this distance, she could feel it like a tangible thing.

Her young helper whipped out his cell phone and punched in a text. Once it was sent, he let her know. Within seconds, he received a reply and said, "He's on his way. Shouldn't be more than a couple of minutes. I'm Mike, by the way..."

She glanced at him and smiled. "Nice to meet you, Mike. Call me CJ – and thank you for your help."

"Sure thing." Then, he said, "Man, that guy is one intense dude..."

CJ turned back, and they became entangled in a two-to-one staring contest. Which turned out to be short-lived because the man suddenly began walking towards them.

"Shit," Mike muttered under his breath, and silently, CJ agreed with him. She hoped to hell his friend in Security got here stat.

As the man neared, her breathing shallowed. She recognized it and forced herself to inhale deeply and exhale slowly a couple of times to try and calm her nerves. But, when the stranger was within feet of her, she felt...sick...his eyes were so dark, they looked black and lifeless. Devilish. Fleetingly, she wondered if it was why he seemed familiar to her...the inner darkness, so similar to others she'd experienced in the past...

"I've been waiting a long time to see you, again," he said.

Her mind reeled. "I'm sorry, but have we met?" she asked as politely and friendly as she could.

His nostrils flared almost imperceptibly, and he nodded. "I was there the night you met Steve," was all he said, which didn't give her much in the way of details.

She racked her brain but couldn't remember much past getting along with Steve that night. They'd been set up by mutual friends and had hit it off immediately. She'd had so much fun – laughing, joking, and getting to watch him perform onstage. She had no recollection of the man before her, and she was beginning to feel light-headed with the anger now radiating from him at her admission that she didn't know him.

"Jesus," Mike muttered behind them. Evidently, he felt it, too.

The stranger shot Mike a death glare, then landed back on her face. He seemed to be searching it – for what, she couldn't say.

This so wasn't right, and CJ's inner alarm rang louder.

"You make mistakes," he said.

_No kidding_.

"Excuse me?" She wanted this man the hell away from her, and _she_ wanted the hell out of here.

"You've made too many mistakes, but I'm here, now."

He made zero sense, and that only intensified her alarm.

"I'm sure I don't understand," she admitted, trying to keep him talking, until Mike's friend arrived and could escort him out of here.

"You don't know what you're doing. It's obvious, or you wouldn't act like a whore. Dating musicians, posing provocatively for album covers, and attending parties in dresses that barely cover your body," he fairly spat. "You'll present yourself as a lady in the future."

_What the fuck_?

She must have said it aloud because two things happened at once. Mike inhaled sharply in time with her shocked reaction, and devil-eyes reached for her. His eyes blazed with anger, and she tried to dodge his touch. But, her reaction was slower, and he got a hard grip on her shoulder. As she tried to pull free of his bruising grip, his thumb became entangled with the thin strip of material there. She wrested free, and it ripped from the front of her dress to dangle behind her. Undeterred, he was able to grab her upper arm in an iron-clad grip. Her heart thudded in her ears because she couldn't fathom what he wanted with her; he was so off-the-wall.

Just then, she heard the clomping of several pairs of feet. She recognized the yellow shirts of Security coming their way and was glad Mike's friend had brought company.

"This is the guy," Mike shouted, which snapped her attacker into awareness of his situation. He looked torn between wanting to continue his physical assault and fleeing. Security's footsteps neared, and he let her go but not before giving her the same death glare he'd given Mike seconds ago. He ran and was promptly followed. Bodies whizzed by, and CJ spotted one of Security talking into a communication device, evidently alerting other security to the situation.

"CJ..." Mike lightly called to her. She must have missed his initial inquiry.

"Yes?" She felt dazed by what had transpired. It was so bizarre.

"Are you alright? He had a pretty tight grip on you, there."

She looked down and saw tiny threads peeking out from where her strap had been torn away in front. Her shoulder and arm felt hot where the man's fingers had gripped her, but so far, she felt fine. Just shaken.

"I'm fine," she confirmed. "I've been through worse," and she wished she'd kept that part herself. This poor guy didn't need to know anymore of her business.

Mike snorted to lighten the mood. "Be that as it may..." and he walked to the side counter and raised it up. "Come on back. I've got a stool with your name on it. You can sit with me, until someone with Security comes back."

"You won't get into trouble for allowing me back there?" she asked a little numbly.

"Hell, no. Not after what I just witnessed. In fact, I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one," and he threw a thumb over his shoulder at the other three staff members who were staring their way.

CJ sighed. "Of course."

"Hey, it's not so bad. You've got witnesses. That crazy SOB should be behind bars."

"Yeah," she agreed and moved behind the counter to sit on the stool Mike had offered.

He walked away to pour her another glass of wine and said, "On the house. Enjoy this one. I'll be right back," and he grabbed a broom and dustpan to clean up the original glass she'd dropped in the tussle.

"I'm so sorry," she said. "I'll be happy to clean that up!" She got off of the stool.

"No way. You stay put. It'll only take a minute. Here," and he handed her a towel, then pointed to the few drops of red on her calves from the splashed wine. Funny, she hadn't even noticed.

"You didn't get cut, did you?" he asked.

"No, no. I don't believe so. Only the wine..."

"Okay, then. I'll be right back."

As she bent to lightly wipe at her legs, she noticed the red stains also on the front of her dress and sighed. So much for totally adoring this dress; it was ruined, now. As she stood upright again, she rotated her shoulder and gently moved her arm because they were starting to feel a bit stiff from the tug-of-war.

"CJ?" she heard a familiar voice call to her. She closed her eyes, inhaled, and looked in his direction on the exhale.

"Houston."

"What's going on? Are you alright?"

Before she could speak up for herself, Mike answered, "No, she's pretty shaken up. She was just accosted by an asshole..."

CJ would have laughed at Mike's description if the situation wasn't so pathetic.

She'd been virtually incident-free since leaving Houston Investigations, but see the man himself for the first time in ages, and the night delivers a probable stalker. Then, who is the first person to show up and inquire about it?

'_And why not_,' she sarcastically thought to herself.

"Is that why we saw Security running through the park?" Houston asked.

"Yeah," Mike said. "I sent my buddy in Security a message, when the guy was stalking her from across the way. Before Lance could get here, the guy comes over and hammered CJ with nasty insults, didn't like her reaction to them, and manhandled her. He's crazy, man."

Houston nodded at Mike and looked back to CJ. "Are you alright? Your dress is torn. Is that blood?" He'd spied the red spots even in the insufficient light.

"No," she answered before Mike could, "it's not blood. It's the wine I lost in the tussle."

"You're bruising," Houston nodded at her, getting angry but not allowing it to show.

"Hmm..." She looked down and saw as much of the tell-tale bruising that she could from this angle. "It'll heal. I hope they catch the guy," and she prevented the shiver that tried to run through her.

"Did you know this man?" Houston asked.

"No, I don't know him," she started.

Mike interrupted, as he was becoming her champion, "But, he sure as hell thinks he knows her. He acted like she needed _saved_ – as in, he was gonna be her savior. The jackass..." Mike refrained from repeating the name she'd been called, but went on, "Aren't you that investigator? Maybe, you can get someone to show you the security tapes and find out who he is. He looked soul-less. Black eyes, the works - and he wasn't letting up on CJ."

At the mention of her name, Mike looked at her a little sheepishly. He realized that he'd cut her off and answered for her, again. "Sorry," he said.

She smiled. "It's fine. Without your help, who knows what might have happened. Thank you." This helped Mike's chest puff back out a bit.

She turned her attention back to Houston. "I don't know him, Houston. He claims he was there the night I met Steve, but I have no recollection of him whatsoever. We were at a bar, so he could have been there, but I was never specifically introduced to him. He'd be hard to forget. So...I've no clue who he is. The creepy feeling he gave me was familiar, but it could be more about history..." She alluded to things he would know and that needn't be aired in front of Mike nor anyone else watching the unfolding events.

Houston nodded in understanding. "Would you like me to look at the security tapes? I'd be more than happy to."

She was surprised that he had asked before acting. "Yes, that would be helpful. Maybe, you can find something and cross-reference it with Baby," she said before she could stop herself. Old habits died hard.

Houston smiled slightly. "I was thinking the same thing. I'll let you know what I find."

He turned to look over his shoulder at Roy. In the midst of all of this, CJ hadn't even noticed he was standing so close. "Uncle Roy, would you mind staying with CJ, while I check this out?"

Before she could say it wasn't necessary, Roy answered, "Not at all. Go see what you can find out."

"Roy, I'm sorry. With the shock of what happened, I didn't see you standing there. But, you don't need to babysit me. Maybe, you can help Houston look at the security tapes. I'll wait to give Security my statement, then have Dicky paged. I came with him, and I'm sure he'll want to see me home as soon as I'm able to leave."

"Then, I'll wait by your side, until you can go." He acknowledged the young Mike with a nod and said, "I know you have good company, but I can help him keep an eye on you while he's finishing up his duties for the night."

That seemed to hit Mike – that he still had a job to do – and he smiled at both Roy and CJ. "I'll be around, when you need me. I'm ready to give my statement, when Security shows. Wouldn't surprise me if the police have been called and make it here, first."

Roy agreed, and CJ wanted the pavement to absorb her. If the police showed up, this would be in the news for sure. Amazingly, she'd not seen photographers, but that didn't mean they wouldn't be hovering soon. She really didn't want to taint Steve's night or usurp his it in any way.

"Roy...can we contact Hoyt and ask him if about giving our statements at the station? I don't want to tarnish Steve's big night and would prefer to keep this low-profile." She looked around and called to Mike, and he came back over. "I want to thank you profusely for your help. I need to leave before the press gets wind of this because I don't want it to make bigger headlines than Steve's album. You'll be asked to give a statement, but you may have to do it at the station. I hope it isn't too much of an inconvenience..." She trailed off because the young man had already gone above and beyond.

Mike nodded his understanding. "It's no problem. I understand. I'll give my statement; you don't have to worry about that. It was really nice meeting you, but I'm sorry your night ended on such a crappy note."

CJ smiled. "Not so crappy. I got to meet a really nice person who more than stepped up to the plate for me. You're a good guy, Mike. Thank you," she said sincerely.

Mike blushed a little. "You're welcome." It deepened another shade, when she leaned over and gave him a chaste kiss on the cheek.

"I don't say this often, but I owe you one." She reached into her mini purse and pulled out a business card. "If you ever need anything, call. What's your last name?"

"Adams." He looked at the business card. "You're a lawyer, too? Man, I knew I recognized you from somewhere other than that album cover. Can't believe I didn't place you." He smiled. "I'm doubly glad to meet you, Ms. Parsons. I might call you for advice, sometime. Believe it or not, I'm studying pre-law at UCLA."

CJ smiled brightly, then. "That's fantastic! I'd be happy to help in any way I can," and she meant it. She liked this young man.

She turned to Roy. "I know I'm moving fast, but I really want to get out of here. I don't trust my luck to hold much longer. Care to join me in a cab ride to the precinct?"

"Absolutely," Roy nodded. He looked at Mike. "Know of any back exits?"

"Sure thing," and with that, Mike called to his co-workers that he'd be back in a few minutes. Then, he led Roy and CJ through to the employees' exit.

"Much obliged, son," Roy said. "We won't forget your help, tonight."

"Thanks, and good luck," Mike said, then left them to be on their way.

"No need for a cab," Roy told CJ. "I'll let Mattlock know I'm taking the car," and he dangled the valet slip between his fingers.

CJ smiled. "You're the best."

They swiftly made their way to main entrance and gave said slip to one of the valets. CJ stayed off to the side as much as she was able, while waiting for the car to be brought around. In the distance, she heard sirens nearing and prayed the valet would return before the police arrived.

Fortunately, that is exactly the way it happened. Even so, a bevy of flashes went off as she was getting into the car. She cursed silently but hoped the press wouldn't have much to report for a couple of days. At this point, she preferred the story about her being seen getting into Houston's convertible with Roy, as opposed to the attack at Steve's album launch.

She smiled at the thought of them being duped for a lesser 'scoop.' Of course, she'd prefer they have to wait to get the skinny on what had happened, but there was always a big mouth willing to tell all for cold hard cash.

Mentally, she crossed her fingers that there would be a day or two delay, before the real story was reported because she really hated being in the news for crap like this...


	10. Chapter 10

Both Roy and CJ made calls on their way to the station.

For his part, Roy called Hoyt and Mattlock, giving both men a heads-up as to what was happening. Hoyt wasn't too happy that CJ had left the scene, but he didn't sound overly upset in light of the circumstances. Mattlock was looking at security footage and figured he would be at the park for some time to come; as such, he was happy to have had even a small part in CJ's 'escape.'

While Roy made his calls, CJ phoned Dicky to give him a synopsis of what had transpired, where she was now headed, and with whom. Dicky was concerned but also expressed his appreciation that the Houstons had been there for her, even while he felt guilty for being nowhere around. CJ would hear none of it, and let him know that she would call him, after she was done at the station.

"Good," Dicky said. "CJ...are you alright? Really alright?" He was hinting at not only the attack but her dealings with the Houston men.

She easily answered in the affirmative. "Yes, Dicky, I'm alright. I promise to call, when this is over, tonight. Love you," she surprised herself by saying, but she'd felt the overwhelming impulse to do so; he had come to mean so much to her.

If he was surprised by her verbal declaration, he didn't miss a beat. "And, I love you. I'm coming to the station as soon as I can get to my car. It may be a little while, since most people are taking their leave, now, I'm coming to be with you as soon as I can."

CJ teared up. "Thanks."

"No thanks necessary. I want to make sure you're alright. I know you're a big girl, so let's call it a kind of paternal need..."

"Okay, _Dad_," she joked but felt a pang at having said the word; she'd missed it so much. While it wouldn't become habit, she welcomed the moment.

Dicky wasn't her father, but their relationship mimicked what she hoped would have existed between her own father and herself – and it was healing what she hadn't, until this moment, recognized as a hole in her soul.

She hung up and sighed, but it was one of contentment.

"How are you doing?" Roy asked.

She hadn't realized he was no longer on the phone, as she'd been caught up in her own thoughts.

"I'm okay. The incident shook me up, but I'm fine – and holding out hope that they caught the guy, and it'll be an open-and-shut case."

If they did catch him, she felt it could be that simple. There was security footage, physical evidence, and several witnesses besides the security recordings. Even if his lawyer or public defender was able to lessen his sentence to a fine with time served, he'd at the very least have a record – and a restraining order in effect. Not that she trusted a piece of paper, but it would help to put him behind bars, if he violated it.

She had a flashback to Christian Dean and wrinkled her nose as the bile rose. She'd worked her way through the past, including Carl's death – God rest his loving soul – but she wasn't immune to the heartache of losing him.

She wasn't the same woman she had been back then, and this time, she determined to contact a couple of friends who worked for the FBI. She was going to ask them to train her, in the event history might repeat itself. She was also going to hit the shooting range and sharpen her skills. She'd been pretty ignorant to think things like this were all in her past and would no longer be in her future.

"There's a good chance they caught him," Roy offered, hopeful.

"Yes. Though, it was a large crowd, which can make things difficult. Plus, it was dark; he could have blended in and lost them. But, I'll stop thinking that way. I prefer to think it's over." She looked at Roy and smiled.

"Are you sure you're not hurt?" he asked. He'd glanced her way, when she smiled at him, and noticed the bruising on her shoulder was darkening.

"They're only bruises, Roy. I'll be fine. Compared to a bullet in the gut, this is a piece of cake," she tried to laugh it off.

He harrumphed but said no more about it.

Shortly thereafter, they made their way into the station. Though Hoyt was at home, he'd called in ahead of them, and an Officer Davidson was waiting to take CJ's statement. He asked her to follow him to his desk and began asking questions straight away. She told him everything she remembered in as much detail as possible. The interview took awhile because he was thorough about taking it all down, which she appreciated; the more details noted now, while still fresh in her mind, the better. She hoped Mike would be able to give his statement to the police tonight, as well.

When Davidson was done asking her questions, she thanked him and started to get up.

"Miss Parsons?" he halted her.

"Yes?"

"Would you mind following me? I need a few photographs for evidence."

Somehow, she'd forgotten about that. It didn't make her happy, but it was a necessary evil. She just hoped the photos wouldn't be leaked and printed in some rag.

She nodded her acceptance, not trusting herself to speak, and followed him to a private room. A female officer joined them, and the requisite photographs of her shoulder, arm, and torn dress were taken.

"We'll call you, if we have anymore questions," he said.

"Okay. Thank you." She picked up her purse, then remembered to ask,"Do you know if they caught him?"

"No, I'm sorry. But, I will call you, when I do know."

"Thank you very much. I'd appreciate it."

"No problem."

She also thanked the female officer and preceded them out of the room and back to where Roy was waiting for her. Only, he wasn't the only one in the small area. Dicky and Matt were also waiting.

"I thought you were looking at Security footage?" she asked Matt.

"I was, and I saw what happened." He looked tense. "I asked them to send the compressed files of every camera for the entire day to me via email. That way, I can watch every angle available...other views in the park that might be overlooked by the police."

She knew he would need to look at more than the incident, itself, to determine when and where this guy had entered the event. Along with his actions throughout the night.

"Okay," she answered. She immediately surprised herself by asking, "May I look at the footage with you? I'd like to see if I can place him. Maybe, if the lighting or the angle is better, depending on which camera caught sight of him, I'll be able to place him. I don't think I will, but you never know..."

He didn't make her wait long for his answer. "I think that would be a good idea. Would you like to meet me at the office in the morning?"

"It'll have to be late morning; I have an appointment at eight. But, I'll head straight to the office, when I'm done."

"Sounds good."

With that, Dicky threw his jacket over CJ's shoulders to cover both her bruises and torn dress. Matt had thought of doing the same thing, earlier, but didn't think she'd be receptive to the offer from him.

They said their goodbyes, and he watched her go.

This sure as hell wasn't how he'd hoped the evening would turn out, but if he let himself think of silver linings, he could admit that he was happy she would be back in the office with him in a matter of hours. Prior to tonight, it was something that would have fallen under the title of "when hell freezes over."

He was concerned about this incident, though. Another man who'd seemingly been stalking CJ. He wanted to get to the bottom of it and make certain there wasn't a repeat of the Christian Dean case. In no way would he allow that to happen.

Matt felt he had a lot to make up for, and this was part of it. He hadn't been there for CJ as much as he could have been – should have been – during that particular time. She was suffering but trying to forge ahead, and though she'd had the help of other friends, he should have been there for her, too. He'd left town, again, and had inquired as to how she was doing, when he returned, but that had basically been the extent of it. Pretty sad, if he did say so, himself.

The two situations weren't the same, but he was here for her as much as she would allow, considering the circumstances. He also knew that he had two older men who would be watching him like a hawk – and making damned sure he towed the line.

Uncle Roy had already expressed his feelings loud and clear, and he was certain that Dicky Bevac felt even stronger than his uncle; he hadn't missed the older man's quiet attention to every movement, word, and nuance that had transpired between himself and CJ.

Yes, he would have to be on his toes.

Game on.


	11. Chapter 11

_Many of you won't be surprised to see song lyrics in this next chapter (Brooks & Dunn, "She Used To Be Mine). Hey...I wouldn't be me, if I didn't combine my love of music and lyrics with my love of prose. Lol. Enjoy!_

As if to slam it home, one last time, the universe made sure Matt fully understood what was at stake with CJ.

He was listening to his favorite country station on the drive into the office, the next morning – feeling light-hearted – when he heard lyrics so poignant that he couldn't mistake that they were meant for him to hear.

_She looked so good movin' 'cross the dance floor  
Better than the day she left me  
Arm in arm with somebody new  
Holdin' hands and laughin' like we used to  
I got my best smile on, but it's no disguise  
It don't hide the pain in these eyes _

He felt a knot in his gut because he'd felt that way these past three years. Every time he saw CJ with someone else, be it on television or when they were occasionally at the same function. He would do his best to hide the pain but always feared his eyes gave him away.

_I did her so wrong, for so long  
Turned my back on her love, now she's long gone  
I did my part, to break her heart  
She walked out on me, and tore my world apart  
She used to be mine  
Oh, she used to be mine _

He turned the radio off. He knew the rest of the song by heart; he'd just never applied it to himself, before. Between the lyrics and sad notes of the fiddle, they lent to him her point-of-view during their relationship.

The lyrics were apt, and he would have wept if it weren't for the fact that those moments in time were long gone. Thank God. Now, he was going to earn her love and trust. He couldn't change the past, but he could control the tone for the future.

It was good timing because she would be with him, today. So, he took it for what it was – a sign that he was on the right track.

'''''''''''''''''''''

CJ's first appointment of the day went very well. She was pleased with how things were transpiring on that particular case.

She was volunteering at a legal clinic, as she'd started phasing herself out of the law firm. Soon, she'd be doing volunteer work much more, as she'd no longer be employed. Not that she needed to worry bout money; having helped Houston build his empire had been lucrative for her, as well.

Though her name wasn't on the building, it was on a significant number of legal documents that entitled her to financial remuneration which had far exceeded her expectations. In a nutshell, she was wealthy, and it was something she would always appreciate Houston for because he had included her in everything, once she'd proven she was worth her salt. She had worked awfully hard and had more than earned her keep, but she hadn't been taken for granted...at least, not until those last couple of years.

But, by then, she was financially set and could choose to do whatever tickled her fancy. Like making a switch to entertainment law. She shook her head at herself. It had been another live-and-learn experience, but it had been a good one, overall. She had met many nice people – not everyone put on a social facade - and she wouldn't have developed a relationship with Dicky had it not been for her career move.

She was now on her way to the Houston, Inc. building and felt a swell of mixed emotions. So much had happened, since the day she left. She had changed; she wasn't the same woman who had walked out of the building - not by a long-shot. The knowledge pleased her, but it also made her feel hesitant about today's meeting, as she didn't want to fall to old habits simply by being in familiar territory.

She needed to remember that she was a client, albeit a special case because there was no way she would sit back and not be involved. With luck, she would hear that her attacker was in custody.

She couldn't imagine Hoyt nor Houston having left her unguarded, overnight, if the man was still running loose. And, she hadn't seen any tails on her travels, this morning, nor had she seen a detail parked on her street. She did know what she was looking for, after all. Surely, these were good signs.

The only thing that gave her pause was the fact that Officer Davidson hadn't called her to say the man had been brought in. Either way, it didn't matter; she wanted to know more about him and figure out why he wanted anything to do with her. She also wanted to know how he'd been able to breach security at the party. _If_ he had; it would be a stroke of luck, should he turn out to be an invited guest.

Baby would be able to provide much of the information she sought. Regardless of whether or not the man had been apprehended, she was going to watch each and every security video with Houston and Roy. With any luck, Houston would give her cart blanche access to Baby, and they would be able to cross-reference information as it became available.

When CJ stepped off of the elevator, Matt was approaching the bar for a glass of juice. He was trying to be healthier and had even stopped his habit of drinking before dinner. He would now enjoy a glass or two of scotch _after_ supper. Some nights, he didn't even want one, which pleased him to no end, considering where he'd been heading not that long ago.

When he heard the elevator ding, he instinctively knew it was CJ and stopped to see her disembark. So, it wasn't a surprise that their gazes met and locked for a few moments. It was only natural, considering the history and countless memories the simple act brought back.

"As I live and breathe, I never thought I would see the day..." Chris said, coming around her desk to give CJ a hug.

CJ laughed. "Don't worry. Hell hasn't frozen over; it's a little more complicated than that," she said as they broke apart.

"When isn't it?" Chris mocked. "I'm sorry to hear about that happened, though. You know, you could have called me."

"I know, but it all happened so fast. It was a head-spinner kind of night," CJ replied.

"I'll bet..." Chris trailed off.

Matt's ears perked up at their interaction.

He could easily discern that the two women had kept their friendship, after CJ left. Why shouldn't they? But, he still felt a small kick in the gut discovering that, while he'd been separated from and mourning the loss of the woman he loved, the friend he worked with on a daily basis had been talking to her the entire time.

Quickly, he rallied. It has been his own fault, and today was not a day for ruminating about it. The band was back together, so-to-speak, in order to help CJ. He needed to place his focus there. Matt tensed at the thoughts starting to run through his mind – about what this man wanted with her - but let them go. Best not to guess. It was time to learn facts.

Meeting up with Chris and CJ in the lobby, he said, "Good morning, CJ. How was your appointment, this morning?"

She smiled. Not the bright one she used to save just for him, but it was pretty and genuine. His heart warmed.

"It went very well, Houston. Thank you for asking." Then, she switched gears, "Have you heard from Hoyt? Did they catch the man? Officer Davidson didn't get back with me, so I don't know one way or the other," she trailed off.

"Actually, I had a voicemail from Hoyt a little while ago. I was working-out in the gym when he called, but he said that he would be heading this way before lunch. He didn't say whether or not they had him in custody, though."

In fact, Matt had been both perplexed and worried about Hoyt's message. It hadn't been what he'd said so much as what he wasn't saying. The fact that he was coming here, personally, also lent to Matt's concern.

CJ must have felt the same way. "Makes me wonder if it's a good thing." Then, she also rallied, "Oh, well. What have you got so far?"

She still knew him well enough to know that he'd already have been through more of the security footage, already.

"Not much. I started at the beginning of the day, but he's not shown up, yet. I imagine we'll see him enter the park later in the day, possibly not long before event time."

"Okay." She patted the attache she'd brought with her, which currently housed her tablet. "Why don't you forward the emails to me, and I'll work backwards in time. See who catches sight of him, first."

"We can do that. Uncle Roy has taken a fairly clear screen shot of him and is checking with his own contacts to see if he can come up with a name."

"Sounds good. Shall we?" she asked, eager to start finding out more about what had happened, last night. Despite her hopeful words to Roy on the drive to the station, she didn't really believe in cut-and-dry, anymore. Something told her there was more to this than a lovesick stalker...terrifying as that could be.

Not surprisingly, she wasn't the only one who had an inkling there may be more to this because the Houston men were on top of it – Roy even engaging his own contacts. She could have sighed in frustration but didn't. Though, she must have had a look on her face because Chris and Matt were both looking at her with some concern.

Matt asked, "How are you feeling, today?" He was referring to the physical altercation she'd experienced.

"I'm fine. Things have to be worse than that to fell me," she said and almost regretted her words.

It was an umbrella statement and could have included their past relationship, but she didn't want to bring any of that up. She had certainly been hurt, but she hadn't been destroyed. In fact, with all she'd been through in her lifetime, she felt proud of her own tenacity: no human, no bullet, no hostage situation, no stalker, and no loves lost had brought her down for good, and she sure as hell didn't intend to roll over and give belly, now.

Reminding herself of this, she stated, "I'm made of sterner stuff, you know." Then, surprising herself, she even added a wink for their benefits.

Chris beamed and said, "You go, girl."

Houston smiled, and it reminded her of the smile he'd given her, last night. This one didn't send her back in time, but it did start a flutter of tentative warmth inside. She didn't try to tamp it down or ignore it because she was through associating hurt with thoughts and images of him, and if they could rekindle a little of the friendship they'd once had, she was willing to allow it to happen. She wouldn't have a discussion about it, but she would let things flow naturally.

Hell, he'd jumped in with both feet and was helping her, after all. It was similar to old times, except for the fact that he'd given her the initial choice of accepting his proffered help.

Of course, she did. She would always trust him with her life. She just didn't trust him with her heart.


	12. Chapter 12

_I hope you're liking this story because I'm having a lot of fun writing it. Enjoy the next chapter. _:)

Now, it was time to get down to business.

But, before they did, CJ felt compelled to say, "I'm sorry I made that comment to Chris."

Matt raised a brow in question.

"About hell freezing over," she said, somewhat ashamed of herself for not only saying it but in front of him.

"Don't worry about it, CJ. I'm not. I know I put you through enough of it," he answered honestly.

Her chest hurt at his words. One - because it was true. Two - because she couldn't believe he had admitted it to her so freely - and wasn't going push past it by explaining away hurtful old memories. She appreciated him for it.

She nodded her head in peaceful acceptance, and they made their way to the sofa.

No sooner had they seated themselves in front of Baby – this time, with Matt at the helm – than Roy came out of Houston's office with several sheets of information. His head was down, but when he looked up and saw the sight before him, he couldn't help but smile. It was good to see his nephew and CJ sitting together in front of Baby, like old times, and without hurt or disappointment in either of their eyes.

He held no illusions about who was to be given most of the credit for it. CJ was a remarkable woman, and his nephew was a lucky man to be given even this much, the ease of burden, from her. As he was thinking this, the woman he mused over stood up and walked to him for another hug. He realized that she'd missed him as much as he'd missed her. It felt right to have her back in the fold, even if it was for a brief time.

As if she'd read his thoughts, she said, "I won't let time and space come between us, again, Roy." She said it quietly into his ear, being considerate of Mattlock, and finished with, "I'm sorry," not a little chagrined that she had let this relationship drop.

Roy patted her back, pleased with her words and said aloud, "I'm happy to see you, too." They parted. "Though, I wish it was under more pleasant circumstances."

CJ caught the look of concern on his face and wondered how much of the information on those sheets of paper in his hand was going to rock her world.

Stepping back, she asked, "What did you find out?"

"Quite a bit, actually." He looked to his nephew and motioned to the bar for both of them. "Let's..."

"That bad?" CJ asked.

Matt immediately hopped up and followed toward the bar and seated himself next to CJ, as Roy poured a scotch for each of them.

"It could be," he said, noncommittally. Sensing their frustration, he quickly added, "Our friend's name is Dominique Aubertin."

He looked up to slide their glasses across the bar, seeing CJ's brows knit together briefly, as if she was trying to place the name.

"Who is he, Uncle Roy?" Matt asked. He hadn't expected information so soon and was glad for it but also wary that it was so easy to receive.

"It seems familiar," CJ muttered but still looked to Roy for answers.

Never one to pull punches, unless he was undercover, Roy stated, "He's Marquis Duval's son."

"_What_?" Matt blurted out. "I thought Junior was his only progeny..."

CJ's face paled, and she reached for her glass of scotch. She remembered flashes of Dominique, now. He had been on the island, too. Remembering, she uncharacteristically downed the amber liquid in one shot.

Seeing the two men eyeing her with shocked expressions, she shrugged it off in a lighter manner than she was feeling.

"Hit me, again," she told Roy. If anyone deserved to get a buzz on, it was she; this ride was about to become bumpier than she'd even contemplated.

Roy complied, and Matt asked tentatively, "CJ, do you remember seeing Aubertin on the island, while you were there?"

Did she remember seeing him? Yes. Though, her memory of him consisted mostly of vague images shrouded in pain. She also remembered him being the only one to come to her aid, after Duval had punished her for trying to escape. She'd reserve some of those details for herself, but right now, she was confused as to why Dominique hadn't come straight out and told her who he was, last night.

Why lie and talk about the night she'd met Steve? He'd been bold enough to approach her and try to claim her like a caveman, after all. Unless, he hadn't been lying about being in the bar the night of their blind date...which brought a chill to her spine. How long had he been trailing her?

This was where she took a moment to ponder her mixed feelings to this point. She really had believed the case with the facts as they were, last night, could be open-and-shut. Yet, as the hours ticked by, intuition had taken over and niggled at her that things weren't so cut-and-dry. All along, she had known the latter was right, but she had so wanted things to be simple.

However, Roy's news brought it home as to why her feelings had been at war: a can of worms had risen from its grave.

"I remember him, now," she answered Matt. Elusively, she stated, "He was the only one who helped me, during a rough time on the island, but I wasn't exactly at my best. Easy to see why I felt the familiarity but still couldn't place him," she said. Then, she sipped at the scotch, instead of downing it, this time.

"Can I ask what happened?" This, Matt asked quietly. He'd always wondered if her two-week stay on the island had been as uneventful as she'd let on; he couldn't fathom that it had been a picnic, but she clammed up at every mention of her time there, and she was a pro at changing the subject.

"Sure, you can," she replied cheerily – the exact opposite of how she was actually feeling, and the act wasn't lost on anyone. Her tone changed, "But, I'm not going to give specifics. I'll admit that it wasn't an overly pleasant stay and will leave it at that. Like I said, when I needed help, Dominique was the only one to give it."

She didn't get up or flee under their scrutiny but regained some of her composure. She knew that her time on the island was long done and over with, and she wasn't going to let it hurt her, anymore. As for Dominique...she wanted answers to the mystery he proposed, now. She almost winced at that word. Ironic. The man was just going to walk off with her, last night – and, forcibly – which was a far cry from romance, courting, and proposals of a different sort. It was also different from most of her memories of him, during her hostage stint.

She almost shook her head to clear her stray thoughts. She needed to get her mindset back on track...

She looked Roy in the eye. "If his name was easy to come up with, and so quickly, then you must know more about him. What's his story?" she asked with a subtle demand.

He didn't hesitate. "Aubertin is the oldest of Duval's two sons. His mother was French, and the story is that she left Duval upon discovering who and what he was; she wanted nothing more to do with him. At the time, she was pregnant with Dominique and gave him her last name, at birth. Father and son were reunited, when Dominique's mother died; he was 17 at the time and ripe for the attention of his father – who taught him all about the family business. However, at 21, Dominique suffered head trauma during a bombing incident gone wrong. He has had mental issues, ever since. Duval kept him in the fold and gave him protection, after that, but..." Roy stopped at the look on CJ's face.

She was thinking that Duval's brand of protection had been incredibly lacking. Once he'd found out that Dominique had been helping her, after the beating she'd taken...well, she could still hear Dominique's cries of pain, as she lay recuperating from her own injuries. She had never seen him, again.

Until last night.

"CJ, are you alright?" Matt asked.

She sighed and looked Houston in the eye. "No. Not really. But, I'm not scarred, either. I'm baffled as to why Dominique is here and what he wants...well, I can guess...but it still doesn't make sense. Unless he's also holding a grudge..." She stopped and thought about that.

If Dominique had mental issues, and he had been tortured for helping her, perhaps he had been angry with her all of this time. She did leave the island without a backward glance, so grateful to be getting the hell out of there. A 'thank you' had never entered her mind – not that she would have doubled-back to search him out and give it, if it had.

She closed her eyes, then. If she pieced this together with the facts as she knew them to be, she could fathom a mentally impaired man – a terrorist, no less - having a crush, helping her out, getting badly beaten for his efforts – by his own father's orders, at that – and then coming for her, one day. He wasn't a 'normal' man, and he might conceivably think she owed him her life, which he would take for himself.

Then again, that theory could be as crazy as the words he uttered to her in front of Mike, last night. Speaking of whom...

"When did Hoyt say he would be getting here? I'm curious as to whether or not they've taken Mike's statement, yet," she said.

"Sometime before lunch. Could be noon or one, by Hoyt-time," Matt half-smiled. He knew there was a lot going on inside of his old friend, and he wanted to help but knew that the best he could do for her was to simply be around. They hadn't spoken, much less confided, to one another in over three years. This had to be enough.

For now.


	13. Chapter 13

Within half-an-hour, the elevator dinged and Hoyt emerged into the lobby of the penthouse suite. As CJ, Matt, and Roy were all still at the bar, they were quick to note his appearance.

Matt rose and said, "Hoyt! I'm surprised to see you here so early. It's not even noon, yet." He tried to inject lightness into the atmosphere because, judging by Hoyt's harassed appearance, the news he was bringing wasn't going to be the best.

He gave Matt a look then stared straight at CJ. "While I'm certainly happy to see you, I sure as hell wish it was under different circumstances."

They nodded at one another, then Hoyt looked to Roy, "Hit me with whatever's in that bottle."

"That bad?" CJ asked for the second time in the last hour. With good reason, her unease grew.

Hoyt perched on Matt's abandoned stool, while Roy poured the scotch and handed it over. "It isn't good," he said grimly. "I'm assuming, you've already figured out who our man is? Dominique Aubertin," he qualified and was given three nods in reply.

"Lay it out, Hoyt," Matt said.

"In a nutshell? We apprehended him, last night, which is why you weren't assigned a detail."

At the sense of relief emitted by the other three, he continued, "But, don't go celebrating just yet. When we brought him in, he was loudly protesting to all corners of the earth that he was only trying to protect you, CJ." He gave her a pointed look.

"Protect me? From what? He said similar things about saving me last night, but none of it made sense."

Hoyt nodded. "Perhaps, but it makes perfect sense to him." He sighed. "This is where the plot twists badly...there were a couple of reporters hanging around – scavenging for information like usual – and they hit the motherload, when Aubertin railed specifically about protecting you from _Houston_."

"What?" she asked incredulously.

"In his mind, Houston's the enemy, and he was only going to make sure you were safe. He wasn't quite that articulate, but it was easy enough to decipher."

Despite CJ's look of horror, he went on, "And, while I hate to have to tell you this, you need to know it: while Aubertin's kept to himself, he's been watching you for years. Over the course of the night, he was very forthcoming with information that allowed us to piece a lot together. By us, I mean local law enforcement _and_ the FBI; the suits gathered evidence from his hotel room in the wee hours of the morning. Things have progressed that rapidly. Anyway, Aubertin stayed in the shadows , but evidently, seeing you and Houston together at the hit a nerve. A departmental psychiatrist has viewed some of the interrogation tapes, already, but she hasn't been allowed to speak with him, yet. The Feds are still with him because of who he is, but there hasn't been much of a mystery to solve in this case. Anyway, he'll be detained, arraigned, and mostly likely wind up wtih a prison sentence for earlier crimes, unrelated to this incident. Of which, I'm sure you aren't too surprised to hear."

Hoyt took a much-needed drink of the scotch, then went on, "Though, I'm sure he'll be released early and sent to a mental health center, due to his impairment – not to mention lack of activity for the last fifteen years. Back to you, CJ...from what we gathered, it seems he's assumed a guardianship role over you, weird as it seems...and seeing you with Houston again lit his fuse. He's gone on and on about how Houston hurt you, but he was going to save you from his miscreant behavior."

Hoyt wasn't finished, and his three friends were in quiet shock so it made it easy to keep going.

"The next problem -" he began.

"There's more?" CJ interjected, mostly to herself.

"- has to do with the reporters I mentioned. They heard Aubertin's rants and quickly reported that your former relationship with Houston was abusive. It even made the morning news, and I'd say I'm surprised that none of you were the wiser, but I know you were busy working on this case."

He looked into his glass, both hands surrounding it. He glanced to both Matt's and CJ's still-stunned faces, his gaze finally pinpointing hers.

"I'm sorry to have to tell you this, CJ, but the pictures taken of you were also leaked to the press. We are investigating as to how, because we know they were illegally obtained, but the damage has been done. The going story is that Houston accosted you at the album party - but you have a hero who was taken into custody, instead."

CJ put her head into her hands. This was incredible. There were no words, except...she looked up at Houston. "_I am so sorry_," she said emphatically.

"It isn't your fault, CJ," he tried to comfort her, but he did feel sick at what was being reported. It was fact that he'd wronged her, but he would never physically hurt her. Never.

Grimly, Hoyt said, "There's more."

"My God," CJ nearly exclaimed, "you can't be serious!"

Hoyt nodded his head, then cleared his throat. "The press is going wild with it. Jumped on it so fast that it's out of control. They're claiming the reason your relationship ended was because of the physical abuse – and last night was proof of it."

"Jesus," she said. At this point, there really were no words...

She looked to Houston. "I'll issue a press release right away. We can also release clips of my altercation with Dominique - and threaten to sue the media outlets who've reported this nonsense for slander or libel, whichever applies, if they don't print retractions."

Both her entertainment and criminal law skills were coming forth to do damage control. "I'll even make a statement to the press," she nearly choked out, her distaste of the vultures getting the better of her.

Roy said, "You're right, CJ. I know it's the last thing you want to do, but it needs to be nipped in the bud before it gets bigger. Talk about your miscreants," he added for good measure.

"I need some air," she said and walked out to her favored spot on the balcony. Once there, she closed her eyes and rested her forearms on the ledge. Then, she put her head in her hands because the heaviness of her thoughts was too much for one thin neck to support.

Matt watched her go, waited a few minutes, then followed her out to the balcony.

Roy watched his nephew, while Hoyt stared into space.

"So, it was a pleasant night," Roy stated sarcastically.

"Mm-hmm. It was a 3-ring circus, and it's spiraled. Aubertin couldn't have picked a better time to rail against Houston."

"Think it was a setup?"

"No. Too much randomness in it, not to mention Aubertin wasn't acting. After your call, I decided to get back to my office and see what I could do to help. I got to the precinct not long before they brought him in, so I saw what happened. He was as angry as they come. He had no clue who was around, not that he would have cared if he had known there were reporters. In fact, I'm pretty sure he would have gone off more. He was a man on a mission - one of saving CJ from Houston. Something happened while she was on that island, and he's held a torch for her ever since. Exactly what happened, not even he would say; it was the one thing he's clammed-up about."

"Hmm," Roy said and looked out at the couple on the balcony. They weren't speaking, but CJ had allowed Mattlock into her space enough that they were only a foot apart.

"CJ won't talk about it, either. Makes me wonder about their relationship, during those weeks," he said aloud.

"Fantasy relationship, you mean," corrected Hoyt.

But, Roy wondered how much was fiction.


	14. Chapter 14

_Next installment. Hope you enjoy!  
As an aside, I've had several family- and work-related issues pop up that are demanding more of my time, right now. I'm a couple of chapters ahead in each of my ongoing stories, and I hope to not lag behind, but this is a heads-up just in case it's a bit longer between posts for awhile._

/

Roy didn't believe something untoward had happened between CJ and Aubertin, but he knew that some kind of relationship had existed. One Duval's son either misinterpreted or established in his mind because of what had transpired. By CJ's admittance, Dominique had helped her through a bad time, and bonds are often established between people in difficult times. Perhaps, it was as simple as this, but CJ had still acquired a stalker - of the terrorist variety - because of it.

On the balcony, he saw his nephew speak to CJ and hoped she would be able to confide in one of them about what had happened. He imagined that she might feel confident enough to share the experience with Dicky Bevac. But, he'd wager that it was one of those things a person wouldn't want to share with someone outside of the circle in which it was experienced. If so, Mattlock would be a good confidante, if she could feel sure of him. Time would tell, but Roy felt that it might be a luxury they couldn't afford.

-

Matt said her name, and when she didn't acknowledge him, he gave her another minute before trying again.

"CJ..." he began.

"I hear you, Houston. I'm sorry, but I'm not in the mood to chat, even though I should be talking with you about what we're going to do. I need a few minutes." She said all of this without taking her head from her hands.

"I'm not worried about what the press is reporting nor what people are assuming, CJ. I'm worried about you, right now."

"Don't be. I'll be fine," she said, knowing it would be true but wishing she could feel better than the "fine" she always snapped back to, after things like this.

She'd been 'fine,' after Laurel & Hardy had tried to kill her. She'd been 'fine,' after Carl had died and she'd killed Christian Dean in self-defense. She had been 'fine,' after Julia's death...after Connie's death...after being shot and defying death several more times...after so much, including being held hostage and beaten by terrorists on an uncharted island. She was always 'fine,' in the end. Including after she'd left Houston and the empire they'd built together.

She half-snorted, half-sniffed at this but still didn't move from her position at the ledge. This was exactly where she belonged, she thought. Near a ledge, even if she didn't feel so bad as to climb up on it and take her fate into her own hands. She blamed the adrenaline junkie inside for liking the excitement of living on the edge for her current predicament, but she also acknowledged it had made her feel alive - something she hadn't felt as deeply, since changing course three years ago.

"There's nothing you can do for me," she said flatly.

"There is. I can be here for you," he corrected. "I _want _to be here for you."

She did glance at him, then. Once her head was out of its handmade cocoon, she stared out over the city. "We're in this together, Houston. We have to be to get through the maelstrom of publicity." She turned to him. "But, I'm going to be just fine. I appreciate you wanting to help, but we're in the same mess. I don't need singled-out."

"I'm not singling you out -"

"You are," she cut him off and turned to look at him fully, "but you don't need to. Like I said before, the past is water under the bridge, and I am made of sterner stuff. I'm not going to break," she added to up his confidence - both in her and in himself. He really didn't need to beat himself up, anymore; an imbecile could tell that it's exactly what he had been doing.

"You know..." she went on, "you weren't the only one in that relationship, Matt. I let it happen, too. I'm not happy with myself because I let it cost me so much, but I've not been angry with _you _for a long time. I should have made contact with you much sooner, and of my own volition, but I kept putting it off because I was too chickenshit," she admitted boldly, "But, being here now...I know that I should have taken the initiative and spoken with you sooner."

The view of the city captured her gaze, again. "But, you didn't make it easy for me to want to return to the fold," she said.

"I know," he admitted. A part of him would always feel like a heel. "All I can say is that I'm sorry. More than you'll ever know."

"I can guess," she said. "But, we need to let it go. Besides, right now, there's a much bigger problem than our relationship-gone-sour. I need to start drafting that press release -"

Just then, her cell phone began vibrating. She reached for it, remembering she'd put it in her pants' pocket during this morning's meeting; she'd wanted to take any phone calls about last night's incident. Considering she was currently with the integral people involved in the case, she figured it might be Dicky calling about this morning's newscasts.

"Excuse me," she told Houston and glanced at the caller ID. Not really surprised, she saw that it was Jake. "Hi," was all she said.

"Hi, yourself. Are you alright?" he asked without preamble.

"I'm fine, Jake." She noticed the sudden tension in Houston, even though he was trying to hide it. She found this interesting but refused to give it more thought.

"What the hell happened, last night? I saw the police as we were leaving, and I knew there was some kind of commotion before that - evidently, there was a chase? - but I was stunned to see the news, this morning. The reports can't be right, surely?" he asked.

"No. The reports are most assuredly not true. They are bogus, and I'm none the worse for the wear," she fibbed a little.

Matt gave her a look, considering she bore bruises, and they were in the midst of an incredibly ugly story about the two of them. She just shrugged; while she loved and trusted Jake, he didn't need to know all of the details. Besides, they were no longer together.

"That's good to hear, but honey, you need to come in off of the rooftop. Someone's been taking shots of you, and they're being aired as we speak," he told her.

"Dammit!" she fairly yelled and jerked away from the ledge to stomp towards the inner office. "Better get your ass in here with the rest of us because we're being photographed," she shot over her shoulder to Matt.

Anger hit his features, sure and fast, but he followed her inside. He heard her telling Jake that she needed to get off of the line because she needed to draft a press release and get the ball rolling on correcting the story being publicized.

"Sure thing," Jake said. "If you need anything, let me know. I'll be there in a minute."

CJ's voice softened. "I know you would be here, and I appreciate it. Thanks, Jake. I'll call you when I can," she said and hung up.

When they'd heard her anger, both Roy and Hoyt had turned to see CJ and Matt enter the office. Now, they had questioning looks on their faces.

"Seems someone's photographing us from one of the other buildings. In the few minutes we've been standing outside, our pictures have been posted on the news. That was Jake, calling to check in and to let me know." She was pissed. "I really hate the press!" she spat, before turning to face Matt. "I need access to your legal team. We need to get on this asap, and I can't do it all by myself," she said.

"You're not going to do it all by yourself. I'll make a call, and we'll get started melting this snowball."

She nodded and looked away but not before he saw the glimmer of tears in her eyes. He wished he could do something to ease her pain, but he was feeling his own and unsure of how to help her, at this point.

He felt as if the Fates were toying with him, complicating things further to keep him at bay with CJ. But, they didn't know who they were messing with, now. He wasn't the same man he used to be, and he wasn't going to let them win, again.


	15. Chapter 15

_One more up. Hope you enjoy it._ :)

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_

By the end of the working day, they had accomplished the impossible. So, other than being thoroughly exhausted, CJ was finally feeling better.

She'd run the gamut of emotions, today. From fear to worry to anger to down-right hatred and back to worry, before hope sprang. Then, there was a light at the end of the tunnel, and they'd reached it. Now that she no longer needed adrenaline to keep running, she was sleepy.

Instead of a statement, they had taken the bull by the horns and requested a press conference. The networks were only too happy to broadcast what CJ had to say. Eagerly, they aired her account and devoured the clips of the actual incident. The press never flinched at their own bogus reporting but salivated at this new development. It wouldn't take them long to figure out who her attacker was - as they'd purposely left that tidbit of knowledge out - and they'd be on her tail, again. But, for now, the ludicrous version had been laid to rest, and she could breathe a sigh of relief that Matt was off-the-hook. As was their relationship.

That is, the bogus version was off the table.

She'd recently hung up from talking with Steve, who assured her that "no press is bad press" (tongue-in-cheek, of course), and his only concern was that she was alright. Their call had alleviated her remaining stress from the day. She'd been so worried about stealing his thunder, albeit unintentionally, and mucking things up for him.

Now, she sat slumped on the sofa in front of Baby. She wanted nothing more than to lay down but was too tired to even manage that. Dicky had shown up hours earlier and was in conversation with Roy at the bar. Houston was seeing Hoyt off, and she was alone for the first time since stepping off of the elevator, this morning. She closed her eyes and focused on her breathing to blank her mind for awhile.

She must have nodded off because the next thing she remembered was the sofa shifting next to her from the weight of another body. She jerked awake and looked at her new companion. It was Matt, and he smiled while handing a glass to her.

"Thought you deserved another," he said, and she welcomed the drink.

"After all of these years, I can finally understand your affinity for this stuff," she said, before taking a drink of her scotch.

He gave a "humph" and took a sip from his own glass. Only a sip because he had no intentions of becoming attached, again.

"Well, that's one hailstorm down," she said. "I've got another breathing down my neck, but it's great to have this one out of the way," she confessed. She slowly turned her head to-and-fro to ease the physical tension of the past 24 hours.

"You're not alone in this, CJ." He wanted her to know she was fully supported.

"I know, but I'm the focus," she said. "Again." It was easy to discern from her tone that she'd had a bellyful, and he didn't believe for a minute that it pertained to only now.

"I'm sure I'm not the first person on your list of confidantes, these days, but would you like to talk about it. Any of it?"

The way she hesitated, before saying no, made him think that he might have made some progress with her.

He'd stood next to her at the press podium, answered every question directed at him - even fielded some that weren't - and he'd handled every detail he could take off of her shoulders in the arranging of the hoopla and release of the security clip. The latter, he'd manipulated to make it difficult for the media to ascertain who Aubertin was; it would be leaked or discovered soon enough, and he had no intention of helping them get there sooner versus later.

It didn't take a rocket scientist to see that CJ was tired, not just physically but mentally, as well.

"Okay, but the offer remains open," he reiterated, and they lapsed into a few minutes of companionable silence. Only the hums from the office equipment and the two older gentlemen at the bar were heard.

"There's still Dominique," she said awhile later.

"There is," he answered.

"If the FBI is taking over...maybe, I can let last night end there, since they have no concern about what happened. After all, Dominique is in custody and not likely to be released. Maybe, I can forget about the whys, for once...let someone else give a damn," and she thought it sounded like a plan. One she hoped with all her might that she could give into.

Matt nodded slowly, after giving it some thought. If it's what she needed, then he'd go along with it.

"If that's what you want," he told her.

"It is." She sighed, then amended, "For tonight, anyway."

They sat in their companionable silence for another thirty minutes, before Dicky told her that he needed to leave and wanted to give her a ride home; she was in no shape to drive.

"Alright," she agreed without hesitation.

She looked at Matt. "I'll be in touch," she said.

Then, she looked to Roy and her face softened even more, "I will keep my promise," she told him, referring to her earlier comment about keeping in contact.

"I'm holding you to it," he smiled back.

"I'll count on that," she said, hugging him for a long moment.

She gave Matt another sleepy but genuine smile, and said, "I have to pick up my car tomorrow. Maybe, we can have lunch in?" She threw out the olive branch.

He snatched it up. "Just say the time."

"I'll see you at one, then - and I haven't had Thai in a long time," she threw in from over her shoulder, as she made her way with Dicky to the elevator.

"Then, I'll have a spread delivered."

Everyone present recognized the need to stay as under-the-radar as possible, right now; CJ and Matt would still be under public scrutiny for a good while.

"Damn straight," she said and laughed, which felt great because she couldn't remember the last time she'd laughed in his presence.

"Damn straight," he mimicked to himself and also smiled, flashing his pearly whites. She was coming back, and it wasn't for any reason other than she wanted to.

/

Once the elevator doors closed, CJ leaned against one wall and closed her eyes. She focused on the blackness behind her eyelids and didn't reopen them until they'd reached the basement garage.

Dicky was staring at her pensively but didn't say anything. He gestured for her to proceed him, and she obliged. They walked in silence to his car, where he opened the passenger side door for her and gently closed it, after she was situated.

When he was buckled in and backing up, she asked, "So, what is it you're wanting to talk to me about?"

He wasn't surprised that she could read him and answered, "I have a lot of thoughts running through my head, after today, CJ. But, the most pressing is my desire to watch over you, right now. Can I convince you to stay the night at the house?"

Meaning his house, and CJ didn't have to think twice. She didn't hesitate in answering, "Yes, I'd like that very much. Let's stop by my house, and I'll grab enough things to stay for a few days."

"Your wish is my command," he said and glanced her way with a smile, pleased that he could keep an eye on her for more than a night.

She grinned back, sleepily, and closed her eyes for a minute – only to be awakened by her sixth-sense telling her they'd arrived. Groggily, she looked around to get her bearings and saw they were in her driveway, and Dicky was killing the engine.

"You need a moment?" he asked.

She yawned in response, which gained a chuckle from him. Then, she stretched before opening her door and getting out to slowly make her way to her porch. The cool night air helped to revitalize her, and she stood on the stoop in front of her door for a few more seconds, breathing in the refreshing air, before she unlocked it and stepped inside.

Once there, she hesitated for a second before making her way further inside.

"Is everything alright?" Dicky asked from behind her.

Flipping the light switch on the wall, her living room was illuminated. She gave it a visual once-over and finally replied, "Yes, I'm sure it's only me. It's been such a long day, and I'm definitely not at my best."

Just then, an orange streak bounded in and greeted them by weaving through their legs and purring loudly. CJ bent down and pet her behind her ears and said, "Hi, Gracie-girl. I'm sorry I've been gone all day. Would you like a treat for your troubles?" She laughed, as the cat's purr got louder at the mention of a treat. "That settles it," she said, and two of the three made their way to the kitchen for the treats.

"Isn't she coming?" Dicky asked tongue-in-cheek of Gracie, who'd found one of her favorite balls and was already batting at and chasing it down the hall in the opposite direction.

"It's the rustle of the bag that will have her running, my dear man," CJ replied and turned on the kitchen light. Again, she gave her space a visual once-over and went about fetching Gracie's treats, before making her way to her bedroom and packing for the few days away.

Unbeknownst to the two humans, Gracie had given her little ball a powerful hit that sent it ricocheting from wall-to-wall and down the hall into CJ's bedroom. Remarkably, Gracie hadn't followed but instead batted a squeaky mouse she'd spied under the coffee table. Quickly grabbing it in her mouth, she took off running in the opposite direction towards the kitchen; she'd heard the squeak of the cabinet door which held her blessed chicken-flavored treats, and she flew towards the sound with her toy mouse in tow.

It was fortunate, for in that moment, the little ball hit the threshold of CJ's bedroom door and set off an explosion that brought the worst kind of fireworks to the neighborhood.


	16. Chapter 16

_I'm sorry it's taken me so long to update. Crazy times. Enjoy!_

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She wouldn't remember these events, but CJ was able to let emergency personnel know that she was somewhat conscious with a moan here and a grunt there.

Some part of her recognized bits of conversation about Dicky and even Gracie, and the small piece that was clinging to consciousness long enough to find out what had happened to them became satisfied, when she heard not only Dicky's voice but Gracie's meow. While she couldn't bring herself to open her eyes and see them for herself, their sounds comforted her enough to drift back to Neverland.

/\/\|-|

Matt had made it home and was drifting off to a peaceful slumber for the first time in a long time, when he got the call from Hoyt. Hearing his friend's seriously frazzled voice, he was on alert from word one. When he was told what had happened – a dispatcher had thought to inform Hoyt at home – he was alternately grateful and in a panic. What if he'd gotten CJ back into his life only to lose her for good? Surely, God couldn't be so cruel.

His gut was in knots at hearing that emergency personnel were attempting to fish both CJ and Dicky from rubble in the aftermath of an explosion at her home. Since Hoyt was talking to Matt on his home phone and an on-site officer via his cell phone, he was getting to-the-second information.

"Hoyt," Matt inserted during a brief pause, "I'm on my way to CJ's now." He'd already thrown his jeans back on, along with a long-sleeved t-shirt and was lacing his athletic shoes. To say he was frantic to get to the woman he loved was an understatement.

"Houston, you can't do anything there. It's best if you meet them at the hospital."

"No, Hoyt," he nearly shouted then calmed himself, "I'm not waiting. Besides, she'll need a familiar face, if she's conscious, and I can ride with her to the ER." His tone brooked no argument.

"I won't try to talk you out of it, but remember to breathe when you arrive. Sherman, the officer I'm speaking with, says it isn't pretty. Hold on," he said and listened to his other line, at which point Houston took off out his front door and ran to his car. At this time of night, he should be able to make it to CJ's in 15 minutes.

Hoyt relayed the information he'd just heard. "They've found her, Houston. She was able to alert them to her position, though she's not fully conscious. Mr. Bevac _is_ conscious and definitely has a broken leg but otherwise seems okay. One of the neighbors has offered to take her cat in, get it to the vet and care for it until CJ gets back home..." Hoyt paused briefly, both for his slip of the tongue – considering her home had been blown to bits - and the fact that there was no way of knowing, right now, how extensive her injuries were.

Funny what the mind will grasp in times like this. Matt idly wondered at CJ having a cat, as she'd always been too busy to have a pet, before; though, she'd always wanted one. Then, he literally shook his head and snapped himself to the present. He started his ignition, put Hoyt on speakerphone, and sped to her house.

/\/\|-|

When he pulled up, he was in a state of shock. The block was aglow with lights from all of the emergency vehicles and spotlights trained on the catastrophe. Incredibly, half of the exterior of CJ's house was still standing, though the interior had been blown either to pieces or into places they didn't belong. Much of the missing half was now laying in the standing half, and that is where CJ and Dicky had been found.

The first stretcher was being brought out by rescue workers, and Matt could see that it was Dicky. He ran over to the older man and heard him thanking them - and asking when he could see CJ, whom he'd not seen since the explosion.

Matt was wondering the same thing and listened intently to the answer given.

A taller man said, "She's being retrieved, now, but it may be awhile before you can see her, sir." He was professional, but Matt was afraid that it might be because CJ was in bad shape.

Evidently, Dicky had similar thoughts, "Why? Is she not going to be alright? What can you tell me?" he asked frantically.

"Sir, sir!" a younger woman, an EMT, called to him. "Please, when we know something, I promise you that we will let you know. But, for now, we need to take care of _you_. We need to get you to the hospital."

"I'll be here for her, Dicky," Matt spoke aloud.

Not having noticed the younger man in his current state, Dicky looked sharply towards him. He stared only a brief moment before nodding. "Let me know, as soon as you hear."

They exchanged another nod of the head before Dicky was loaded into the back of an ambulance and taken away.

/\/\|-|

CJ knew this wasn't reality because it was too bizarre. For one, she couldn't be in multiple places at once, if she was conscious.

She was back on the island and seeing through her eyes, but when she looked out, she saw not only those experiences but others in time, as well.

From the bed she sat upon in her tropical prison, she saw her father playing with her as a very young child and was simultaneously able to be with him in her child's body, as well. It was surreal. She was both free and joyous, while being held captive and feeling afraid.

The worlds were too far apart emotionally, and it was painful to experience. She longed for her early childhood but couldn't seem to stay there; she couldn't forget where she sat and all that she'd been through since.

If only things had turned out differently...

Then, she was with Matt on Bill's ranch back in Texas. They were at one of the biggest barbecues of the year, and everyone was there. At the same time she was having fun as a young woman with the world at her feet and life laid out before her, she could see herself in the future and losing the man she loved, the one who had always been there, and it took her breath away...in both times and places. Was it written in stone? Would their relationship truly end, never to return?

CJ couldn't fathom it, but the tale being played out seemed so foreboding.

Then, people began flashing through like strobe lights, in experience fashion. She was laughing with Jake, loving him and feeling loved in return. She and Steve were laughing and having a great time at a rodeo, which was surreal in and of itself; they were seated in the bleachers with Dicky and his date...Clover...one of Matt's past flings? Weird.

In the midst of this technicolor dreaming, she questioned her sanity.

Which made her think of Dominique, who popped in to save her from a faceless enemy. The one turned into many, and he sprouted wings as he slayed demons with the faces of Robert, Christian, Erin, Costanos, Duval, and even Elizabeth.

Wait. Duval?

Dominique was slaying his father for her. There was something about this which made her pause her own dream to study it. She couldn't understand why it made perfect sense, as it was about more than the incidents on the island, but she didn't know what those reasons were. Did she?...

Dominique had literally picked her up and nursed her, when she couldn't do it for herself. Duval had been so irate that she'd ran from him that he'd began her punishment, himself. A backhand that knocked her down and hitting furniture on the way, a yank up, a few more slaps across the face, all while spouting that she might be beautiful and intelligent, but she was no match for him - she'd soon see.

Only, Duval hadn't finished what he'd started; he'd given the job to one of his lackeys, a hulk of a man who obviously took pleasure in knocking her around. Somewhere in the midst of the unfair fight, she'd caught a glimpse of Dominique through a window. He'd looked stunned and angry, and so, she wasn't entirely surprised to find him coming to her aid later in the day.

He'd ignored threats from his father and helped her, anyway. He'd been kind, caring, considerate, and she hadn't feared him. It was something she went with and didn't question why.

Hey, there _was_ a time when she let go and didn't dig for whys; she took the help she could get and never balked at who gave it. In fact, she'd shed a few tears for Dominique two days later, when she heard his cries of pain...after Duval had had him dragged from her side.

It surprised her that she hadn't been punished, again, too. Though, she figured the sycophant had allowed her to hear Dominique's cries as a punishment all its own.

Funny how she could remember these details, now, but couldn't at the album party. Fuzzy states unite?

This is when she stopped studying her dream and let it fall away.

Away...

She was away at college and missing Matt, Bill, her friends, and the other ranching families she loved so much. She knew that she was on the right path towards making her goals realities, yet she couldn't help but feel lonely. It was an emotion she knew all too well.

She started to cry in her dream and thought she must have been crying in her body, as well, because she felt intense pain...somewhere, she couldn't place it...that made her yelp. Then, in a flash, it all disappeared – the pain, the tears, the dreams – and she was adrift in a quiet sea of black that soothed her.


End file.
